Oh man, I hear you. Last year I got to the point where if I kept it up I would crack, so I stopped. I put him in charge of things I REALLY didn’t like doing: birthday gifts/parties, special projects, school supplies.

He's always reminded me of Grawp...

Late Feb, ftw! When we took my 4 year old for his birthday, the longest line we waited in all 3 days was 20 mins for Pirates, no fast pass.

Ketchup is an abomination.

The largest undergrad computer lab at my grad school had Macs that ran Windows. They were usually open because people (myself included) were afraid of them.

Try to convince everybody he’s as great/perfect for the job as HE thinks he is?

Imagine using time & energy to actually make sure they raised smart, decent humans instead of entitled idiots.

What a PRIVILEGE, to be able to live a time of “joyous indirection...”

Right?! I’m not an expert, but it seems these women have much better taste in friends than boyfriends. Their besties seem legit.

WAS in a band.

I’ve been sitting on this for a while, but I think now is the time.

He should just follow Jordan Peterson around. I imagine the same assholes being into both...

Thanks to Amy Schumer, to my husband and me he will always be known as Cradle My Baunch...

Why does her hair always look dirty?!?

We had another case in Laredo this year where an agent killed his mistress AND THEIR BABY, then pretended he just happened upon their bodies...

Seriously. I read this almost a year ago and am still traumatized. Some. Men. Don't. Wipe. Ever. https://www.buzzfeed.com/juliegerstein/listen-up-men-we-need-to-talk-about-how-to-wipe-your

Right?! I have a genetic pre-disposition to alcoholism so I’m too careful but...this seems like a lot of wine! 

When it comes to these a holes, to quote George Carlin: “if you’re pre-born, you’re fine; if you’re pre-school, you’re fucked.”

100% honest question: does seaweed smell like it?? I HATE the beach because of the smell of seaweed and the only other smell that provokes the same reaction is splooge, so I’ve always wondered...

Yasss! All this time I assumed that’s what they were, thanks to this sketch!