My advice is to put away the papers and the computer (unless it's to watch Netflix!) and spend tonight and tomorrow relaxing/distracting yourself. When you're at this point—essentially, you're already there, you just need to jump through the hoops. Keep in mind that you know your dissertation and supporting literature…

So I have a question...once an abuser, always an abuser? If someone is been abusive in the past, should they always be considered abusive?

apparently fried coke are really dough balls soaked in a coke syrup, and then fried...so more like a coke-flavored donut?

With chemicals. I talked to the landlord this weekend and he said that he'd schedule a pest control consultation. Hopefully they will be able to take care of it. My apartment is basically a very old house converted into multiple apartments, so that is a concern. I do have wood floors, so I guess that's a slight plus?…

Haha, I did wonder if the bf I knew was posessed by demons or something... made about as much sense as everything else.

It does, washing in hot water and drying on high heat works for linens. The problem though, is they can live in the bed, the bedframe, walls... my mattress and box springs are encased in bedbug proof covers, the room has been bombed, but some are still there :(

I have put earth along the floor/molding and around my bedframe (as well as under the couch cushions). I hope it helps, but I've read it doesn't kill instantly (rather they walk through and die within the next day) so I don't know if it will really serve as an effective barrier. I also am a bit nervous about having…

In some ways, maybe that feeling and recognizing that distance could help you in being able to move on? Unfortunately for me, I get back into the trap of wonder how he could have done an emotional 360 so fast, and what the hell happened to the person I felt 100% certain I would marry...I know its something I'll never…

I posted last week that my apartment had bed bugs. The property manager bombed my bedroom, I slept on the couch for three days and washed everything, then went back to sleeping on my bed. I was okay for a couple nights, but then last night one was crawling on me while I was awake with the lights on, and I flipped…

I hear ya. I'm a few years older than you, and I'm in the same boat...only sometimes an even more isolating boat, because most of my friends have kids. And I spent a few years in a serious relationship living with my ex, and as the friends were too busy and shrinking away... my social life began to revolve around him…

uggh, I hear you. I've had that experience every time I've had to talk/be in contact with my ex (and because we had some shared pet custody issues, it was an ongoing thing I had to deal after we broke up). It don't how someone can go from being supposedly madly in love with you and be talking about marriage and your…

That lack of education, or an assumption of a lack of education, is part of the reason people feel the need to concern troll. There is a risk of placental abruption in late pregnancy, and women are generally advised to avoid heavy lifting for that reason. In this women's case—it's her own decision. If she's a…

Wow I'm so surprised people were so negative about it! I would love to do that, but I also would be a bit scared...partially for genuine safety reasons, partially just because I do think being alone and isolated anywhere besides my own apartment is a bit scary. But perhaps I will someday when I have a dog again to…

I have fallen that fast and that hard before—sounds like a similar situation to your past relationship, we were instantly together and stayed that way through 3 1/2 years, through living together and long-distance... before ending in a spectacularly horrible way. I will say, in retrospect, jumping in so fast meant…

I also would recommend getting a roomie over getting a second job—but think looking for a cheaper place with a longer commute would be a better option as well. I feel like its harder to live with a roomie after you've gotten used to either being by yourself or with a significant other. However, on the other hand,…

I've lived in cities that have had a really good food options...and some that completely didn't. The city I live in right now is weird—there are some great farmers markets, but not a single grocery store downtown. It's funny that you thought it wasn't great at carrying local products—I actually went to the WF in my…

If you really want to be together, don't let the distance scare you. Most of friends have done it, and the two serious relationships I had both involved distance (and actually, it seems nearly everyone I work with right now is in long-distance relationships/marriages—this is unfortunately very common in academia). If…

You could just e-mail/post something on facebook without going into the details of why its important to you. The people that know you better will already know, and you won't have to feel anxious about overloading people or feel like your asking for pity.

I do prefer Whole Foods for some things. It wouldn't be where I'd regularly go to shop (way too expensive), but I like occasionally trips there to supplement my usual grocery shopping with certain things from there that I'm not able to elsewhere. Same thing with Trader Joes—I don't regularly shop there, but…

I get this is a rant, and I understand your frustrated about the prospect of gentrification endangering local businesses. However, I think your reaction is rather harsh. I would hate to think that my neighbors were judging me, and concluding I was a shitty stupid person, based on the bags I came back with one day.…