You should have warned me, I nearly burst into flames when I clicked to that site.

You've had 400 years to get caught up. I am unrepentant.

Erm... Spoiler alert! Jeez! X

and the way you think the music is part of the soundtrack until Kat turns it off.

Yes, and the slap heard 'round the world!

Only one of the best seasons ever! I am loathe to admit that season of Real World and 10 Things both greatly influenced my decision to look at (and ultimately attend) schools in Washington state.

Favorite Bette Davis movie! It kind of has to be All About Eve, right?

BEST. COMMENT. EVER.

Gawd, talk about clickbait. You, as a writer for a blog that is part of an actual business, have a moral, ethical, and legal obligation (spoiler: I have no idea what any of those words mean) to write about the things I want you to write about, all the time until the end of time. Now let me fixate on a typo you made…

I love you too! It had his uniform and everything in it. He did me dirty, though. Really dirty.

One rule of Maury is, if a woman goes on the show with over three different men and states to have slept with many more at the potential time of conception, none of the guys who go on the show will turn out to be the father.

back hair = foot warmers.

Sometimes you don't have to exact revenge. The universe will do it for you.

Picture it. Senior prom. 2003

Overnight camp, 13 years old. I've recently gotten my first period, but haven't yet figured out those pesky tampons. My resourceful mother fills an empty expensive hair product container with lube so that I don't have to be embarrassed by a giant tub of KY in the bathroom next to my brand new tampons.

This was in college. At the time, I was dating this nice girl from the second floor. She was friends with my roomie and the guys on my floor. Anyway, it didn't work out, we broke up, no big deal. About a week later, I get a knock on my door. I open it to find a teddy bear, some shaving cream, a razor, and a note…

I dumped a jar of pickles into my ex-boyfriend's gym bag when we both worked for a professional sports team.
The man hated pickles.
I don't regret it.

I used to work at Hobby Lobby in high school, and after I was let go basically for daring to be in after school sports and requesting time off so that I could be in a play, I proceeded to steal probably hundreds of dollars worth of art supplies and random petty shit throughout the years. I have no remorse. Where's…

There was this guy I worked with who was a total asshole. He was always trying to, and sometimes succeeded, in undermining me with my colleagues and public. I would confront him about his behavior and he would say, "I don't know what you're talking about". He had kind of a bum leg and he would ride his bike back…