I'm always _so_ tempted (but have never yet been ballsy enough) to gift the newlyweds with something hideous and unreturnable. Estate sale velvet paintings of clowns come to mind.

As in this story, many of us in marriage equality states are already facing this fun. I'm attending a gay wedding soon where the couple registered for nothing less than $75. Entitlement knows no gender preference! God bless america.

Am I the only one here who assumed when he said "sham of a marriage" he was referring to the fact that they were treating it like some kind of fucking fundraiser??

When the bride says that weddings are to make money for the future, that kind of clues one in that the marriage is a sham.

I don't know, his very first response I thought was remarkably nice considering they asked him for a receipt — just sidestepped the weirdness, apologized for giving a gluten-y gift, and thanked them for the invite. Eventually he gets really rude too, but for my money he comes out looking amazing next to their gall.

Weddings are to make money for your future..

We'll know that we've reached true equality when gays and lesbians feel free to approach their wedding with the same vulgar sense of entitlement and ingratitude that straight people have.

Well, hold on a second. First off he's been saying he had some kind of Native American ancestry way before this. It might be family stories, but lets say he's just the tiniest bit native American. Are you saying he doesn't have enough? And if your saying that , isn't that sort of like saying your not white enough, or…

This sounds suspiciously like the plot for those "Fifty Shades of Crap" books.

Ramen noodles?

I'm pretty sure we all know how most of that "comforting" ends up. I don't buy for a second that this isn't strictly erotic for at least one member of the couple.

You left out the most batshit quote of the whole article:

Physically pick her up and put her on your lap???

Yeah, I recently slapped a guy in the face for doing something analogous to me at a bar. It was the first time I have ever hit someone. I was arm wrestling a friend and he just got in. my. face. and wouldn't fuck off (because even though two male friends were doing the same thing a few minutes ago and no one gave a…

I for one, fully endorse "getting in close" when you are flirting with me. How else will I be able to jam my heel into your instep with the force I want if you're not all up in my personal space?

One reason not to be excited: There has never NEVER been a good movie adapted from a video game.

I think the issue is that "women don't create marketable movies" is too ingrained into the minds of those in the position to launch the careers of aspiring writers and directors.

THEN I WILL PROMOTE YOU OUT OF THE GREYS! I WILL DO SO WITH MY POWER OF CAPS LOCKS. FOR I AM BURTREYNOLDSISMYSPIRITGUIDE, SCOURGE OF VILLAINY, HERO OF BIRDS, AWARD WINNING DECIPHERER OF BULLSHIT.

There's a lot of factors at play when discussing the lack of women in Hollywood — on screen, behind the screen, and otherwise. The most obvious of these factors? Advertisers, producers and "The Studio System."