That family is a bunch of shitheads.

I have no idea how to deal with this photo. What.

Speaking as an Italian, I will never, ever eat microwavable pasta unless I were really forced to choose between that and abject starvation.

Never say I don't love you.

Cute! But good luck getting Italians to microwave their pasta, Findus. They literally make stovetop pasta for their dogs over there.

Ostriches are assholes. I'm glad he's harassing them.

I miss that show so much

This is seriously the most amazing thing I've heard. Not only is it hilarious, it has a cool, tropical vibe. I hope his friend is un-stabbed, though.

— and screw them anyway, since almost every terrible tipper is going to tip horribly no matter how good or bad the service was.

I agree. Personally, I'd always offer to throw away a cup. It's my personality. I'd ask "Do you recycle? Where should I throw away my cup."

Klee, don't be a goof.

and listen Anna Nicole Smith said she fucked a ghost once and she seemed credible.

Stop projecting your feelings onto others. Not everyone thinks the meaning of life is children and CLEARLY not everyone wants to have kids. Get over yourself.

sure. for society as a whole.

Well, since there seems to be lots of evidence of the assault, I hope that the assailants are arrested. If that does not happen, I hope that Tyra and Janell file a lawsuit against the authorities for not prosecuting, and against the perpetrators themselves.

I'll take any and every opportunity to whip out this delightful quote from Michael Caine about Jaws 4:

I support his right to refer to himself however he choses. I support that right for everyone.