if only jezebel would follow his lead.

If she wants to look like Michael Jackson, that’s her business.

Haha I just said almost exactly the same thing before I read yours! #Solidarity

The saddest thing is a leading presidential candidate grinning like a moron in a selfie with a Kardashian.

I like it when you call me Big Papa

missed opportunity

This is such goddamn fucking puritanical bullshit. It has me so irritated and incredulous that I can’t form a good response. Fuck this fucking shit.

But if young women don’t read Cosmo, how will they learn the simple and finite rules of haircare? Murderers will be getting off scott free.

My lifestyle brand involves day-drinking whipped cream vodka.

And will be a virgin after several years of marriage to him, no doubt.

Adam Levine doesn’t need instagram. He just goes out there and gets the job done!

Okay so I want to be all feminist enraged...but Komen is shit...

You know what’s more terrible than the police not taking this case seriously?

Khloe better be wary while she’s dating Harden. Dude will try to score over and over again but when you need him to defend you he’s nowhere to be seen:

Does the tube part of a beer bong count as a straw? Asking for a friend.

Cool, but can we lose the Hope Solo photo? She makes me physically ill.

Me either. But I belong to a fetish community online and you wouldn’t BELIEVE how many kinksters are chefs. God, I love me a pervy man who can cook...

Chef Aarón. NO CONTEST. The little bits of his extensive tattoos sneaking out of his shirt sleeves? Game over.