You fame whore.

I always assumed it was a big, fat hoax. But, in looking back, it turns out guys like Gamboa Constrictor, Clinton Portishead and Rare Endangered Vuvezela really did used to comment here.

Do NOT fuck this up, people.

Hmmm. On one hand, this was the biggest story in the history of Deadspin. On the other, this guy was not impressed.

without this...we would have never had this

His explanation is kind of a letdown, really. I thought he was doing a dynamite Tom Coughlin impression.

Can we all just agree that the most surprising thing about this chart is that someone with the moniker Lvl9LightSpell actually cares about sports.

Who wants to humiliate their sibling in front of millions?

We all know he wasn't a "True" Raders fan or the article would be talking about the woman recovering from her impalement wounds too...

Holy shit, a completion in Oakland.

Adidas just announced Derrick Rose's new slogan: All day I dream about surgeries

Fuck, nothing funny to say. This sucks.

On paper, Jimmy Graham may be the most productive TE in the league, but when it comes down to execution, you gotta with Aaron Hernandez ...

Yup. Even the shithead players, to some extent. There's absolutely no reason amateur sports should be paired with college other than an accident of history.

Wow. I ended up feeling incredibly bad for almost every single party in this story. The faculty, the advisors, the players, damn near everyone. Well, except for the coaches and NCAA. Per usual.

That was a great read. Kudos.

So we're taking David Schoenfield's advice now? It's more likely they sign Cano than put the top rated prospect in baseball in their lineup? I doubt they would spend $25 million a year on Cano when they can put Profar in for pennies and get good production while spending that 25 mil on multiple contributors a la this…

Except moving Fielder allows the Tigers to make a reasonable run at Max Scherzer, and puts more speed on the basepath ahead of Cabrera and Martinez. It also makes a playing spot for Castillanos at third and puts Cabrera back at fiest, a better position for him.

Tigers probably got the best two years out of the Prince contract, and got out before the bad half showed up. Pretty shrewd.