Well she certainly wins the prize for the longest lasting most permanent mind-fuck of all time. Sorry that happened to you. I hope yyou’ve had a good support system.

Thanks for writing this for all those who struggle with toxic mothers, and have mothers’s day to remind them of the many emotions that surface to cope with that. Could you do the same around father’s day for those of us that were put through the wringer by toxic dad/daughter relationships? Thanks in advance!

17 years ago, my mother and i got into an argument on mother’s day{nothing i ever did was ever enough}. we lived about 60 miles apart so i didn’t go see her that day because she had been screamng at me over the phone, so why go over for more of that? almost a week later, i went on over with her card and gifts and…

I used to work with some folks who survivors of abusive families, and it was remarkable that so many managed to become quite lovely people despite having either inadequate or out and out violent psychosis from a parent or parents. So, they definitely deserve a toast, and well done, all of you.

this is as close to my mom as anyones come. I am the naturally large daughter of a tiny pixie, and not a day went by growing up that I didnt hear about it. Once my dad is gone, I might be done. I waffle about it.

We may have the same mother. Literally everything I do in my life that is different than the way she does it, is seen as a personal attack on her. She’s still bitter that I moved away (tried to prevent me from leaving the nest be refusing to pay for application fees to college other than the one local school) at all.…

{{{{{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}} to everyone who NEEDED this post!

Text from my mom on my birthday: “Happy Birthday! It’s your mom btw. It’s not like you call or anything smh.”

I haven’t spoken to my mom in several months and I’ve been dreading this day. I asked my therapist if I should buy my toxic mom a card, if only to show that I’m ok. (She likes to tell herself I’ll fall apart without her constant overbearing behavior). There isn’t a card for, “our relationship sucks but there’s this…

if you want to have your mind blown, check out this examination of estranged parents forums. these people are evil:

Here is a great book on Toxic Mothers and how to deal: http://www.amazon.com/Toxic-Mom-Tool…

Thank you for this. I have been distancing myself from my mother lately for various reasons and sometimes I feel like the worst person in the world because of it. My mother loves me and has been a good mother, but cannot accept that she does not come first in my life, firmly believes that I am still a child under her…

i’ll drink to this! not everyone is cut out to shape the lives of other people.

I have a relative who treats her daughter that way. She would be horrified to learn that other people are concerned about how she relates to her child, but the poor kid is the super-mega-star of a lavish 24/7 praise party on her mother's Facebook page — which she's old enough to be able to read.

I think a lot of this is that people who are close with their family don't understand the concept of not being close with your family. My parents weren't abusive, and I don't actively dislike them or anything, but...I just don't want to be around them. Like, almost ever. I have one or two things in common with my…

Agree! My mom is definitely a "you and your sibling are my wooooorld!!!" type of parent and like to ask just how much we're going to take care of her in her old age. This is particularly stressful to me since my mother and I have very different personalities and while I love her, I cannot stand to be around her very…

Or my personal favorite:

I have some experience dealing with someone (not a parent) who is so willfully disconnected from reality that they just don't understaaaaaand why you're upseetttttt what did they do wronnnnng can't we talk about it? And fine, you summon your backbone and your patience and you explain it clearly and simply. And your…

As the child of a narcissist (my father- thankfully my mother raised me) I can guarantee that grown children do not cut off ties with their parents because the parent did too good a job at building the child's self-esteem or because the parent won't support the view that the child has of themselves. Not talking to a…

I think sometimes abusive parents have a tendency to believe the lies they've told themselves about how wonderful their children's childhoods were. Particularly if their children turned out to be decent adults.