'She was a horrible decorator. Money cannot buy you taste. She would put plaid with stripes and all sorts'

I am currently growing out my pixie and I call bullshit. No. Even though she did have a fairly long pixie, hair does not grow that damn fast. You cannot have a wearable pixie one month and a wearable bob the next month no matter how amazing your stylist is. You have to go through a period of not-that-cute. I also…

I desperately want to Google "Rasputin's Penis," but I'm at work. Thanks, Callie :|

Btw Jez community, he's also pals with suspected douche bag Jared Leto:
http://globalgrind.com/2014/03/03/ter…

Say you are offering a starving person the donut but only if they sign over the rights to the custody of their first born child. Then you are taking advantage of that person's position of weakness in order to sell your donut, right? Isn't that pretty morally shitty? It's the same thing here. The chance to do…

Of course you wouldn't.

Here to stay, baby.

Right. We transfer down there a cute kid who doesn't know his ass from the music business' hole, you process him into the faux-monster that he is, and now you want to force us to take him back.

Norman Bates' mother's corpse looks better than Trump.

I really enjoyed this Slate piece on the treatment that both Kim Novak and Liza got at the Oscars. The part that got me was the use of the "she should grow old GRACEFULLY like so-and-so" regarding Novak, as I saw that a lot on my Facebook feed during the Oscars. When people say that, they are typically referring to…

Fast forward two or three years and Tess is completely fed up with Harry's moody, borderline-alcholic, ass. I never read 50 Shades, but someone who I trust did and told me not to read it because it would make me angry. My sister in law asked why I wouldn't read it and I said "I heard the guy is a jerk and the girl…

Why is it that women and men use girly as an insult. GIRLS ARE THE BEST so I don't understand and will never take it as an insult or think it should be something anyone should be ashamed of.

Now I wish I had a Jesus watch. "Christ, I'm late!" "GOD HOW HAS IT ONLY BEEN FIVE MINUTES?" The possibilities are endless.

I used to have a watch with Jesus on it, just for the one joke,

Idris, just know that I would/will make an amazing stepmother.

If Idris will never be my boyfriend, why go on living?

This "really bad fanfic turning into real books" trend HAS TO STOP before my brain explodes. I wouldn't mind if it was good fanfic (and there is a lot of good fanfic out there!) but it's always this horrifically written bullshit that is like the high fructose corn syrup of reading.

I thought Twilight was bad but it's literary greatness compared to 50 shades of shit

...except Fifty Shades was (in a documentable fashion) sloppy Twilight fanfic.