yeah, even i don’t give blowjobs like that and i can be a pretty fancy lady sometimes.

Fat jokes: the last vestige of people who truly have nothing intelligent to say.

It’s cool, you can join our group. We’re the World’s Okayest Moms- and we’ve got the mugs to prove it. (sorry that the picture is giant and fuzzy) Here’s your welcome bouquet.

I just realized that the Duggars serve as proof that Idiocracy was more than just a movie. Mike Judge is a genius.

You’ll have to find out. I sure hope so.

Satanists are an inspiration across many faiths.

i didn't even realize they still made those

[winky emoji]

If you can afford to buy a pack of bottled water you can afford a 20 dollar brita pitcher.

You can't afford to go buy a Brita pitcher or something, but you can afford to buy bottled water? That doesn't make sense.

Phthalates are not carcinogenic. They may cause other problems, but cancer is not one of them.

You're a horrible, horrible monster.

I'm with your husband on this: get an actual reusable water bottle. Better for your wallet and MUCH MUCH better for the environment.

Um, this is entirely unreasonable. Buy one good water bottle that is suitable for reuse and use it forever. Stop buying water bottles. You are indeed a wasteful monster. Make an effort to change your habits because you are clearly in the wrong. You create this problem. Solve it yourself.

This kid knows what’s up.