I am unable to do any *other* impressions but for some reason I am able to sing “we have a pepper bar” with absolute fidelity.

“They don’t litter their faith everywhere.” [kisses gathered fingertips]

I collect Chick tracts; my rule is that I can never pick them up from a stand or purchase them. I have to get them “In the Wild.” I got the lion’s share of my (neatly complete!) collection in NYC, child. NYC!

THIS IS WHAT I DON’T GET!

OK this is a complete departure BUT YOU STARTED IT! :)

Oh man. My name’s Jacob and I was really shocked and awed to discover what a complete A-Hole the biblical Jacob was. I was like: did you even read the story before you went with that?

I’ll just leave this here

This is amazing. I saw A.I. for free and when it was over I was still fantasizing about ways to get my money back.

Not sure I follow: I’ve seen a few ‘shops in my day and THAT is an ACTUAL Pepe.

(But yes! Bring it!)

I don’t have a particular dog in this fight but recently a friend of mine only discovered her foot was broken in several places after I urged her to get it checked out; she was aware of the pain but didn’t think it was a big deal and thought it would just heal on its own. Just advocating for the devil. :)

I've wasted my whole morning reading these stories and your comment made the whole event worth it.

Permanent LOL for "David Bowie's Dick Antics."

• KICKED BY A YOUNG CHILD @ SCHOOL WHO WAS WEARING FASHION BOOTS

GAH! I hated that!

That's interesting: once I was looking into chemical dependency in another context and came across a checklist that purported to hip you to whether or not you were an addict. The items were all these super surface-level, totally obvious things like "have you ever tried to quit" or "have you ever gone to an event under…

Right with you.

Right now, I feel exactly like the Ron Paul "It's Happening" gif.