Trump: I don’t stand by anything.

Sam Bee is the fucking best. Sorry I have nothing more insightful to add.

Since you sound like someone who’s physically incapable of being pregnant, you should shut the hell up, like forever.

Obama could charge whatever he wants as far as I care.

You should visit a film set. It’s far more demanding than you know, putting aside your “a few kicks and jumps here and there” nonsense.

I MISS HIM SO MUCH IT LITERALLY HURTS.

THIS. ABSOLUTELY THIS.

He didn’t sell out anything. He saved our economy and implemented the most revolutionary healthcare change (okay, tied with Medicare/Medicaid) this country has ever seen. He also gave us two excellent Supreme Court Justices, some good environmental regulation, and pretty much kept us out of any major wars.

It was a good thing none of them were ladies. His wife wasn’t around to protect him.

His definition of “full head of hair” is pretty loose.

You know, I’m starting to think this guy isn’t as good a negotiator as he claims he is.

I don’t even speak to my republican coworkers after one fucker told me “I guess you’ll be moving back to somalia now” on November 9th. I work at a nonprofit in Silicon Valley and have never lived in HOA.

As an Asian person I would like to say how frustrating it can be to tell people, yes we experience racism. And they’ll be like well you guys are so smart! And you’ll be fine.

Obama is probably somewhere wearing flip flops and laughing like a mofo.

I tried really hard to be happy for those whose lives will be saved—literally saved—by the continuation of Obamacare.

HAHAH AHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAH AHA HAHAHAHAHA HAHA HAHAHA HAH HAHAH HAHAH HAH AHHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHA HAH HAHA

To all the moronic fuckers who either actively wanted/turned a blind eye to this racist, sexist, xenophobic, and downright vile piece of shit because “he was a strong leader”. Look at your strongman President now, running like the fucking coward he is, unable to get his own Party to vote against the ACA which they…

The fucking rallies! Our tax dollars are supporting this bullshit! This is like a 1,000 Obama rounds of golf, wrapped up in a ‘fuck you’ bow, and broadcast on Tv, because my PTSD and weed consumption is not already maxed out!

I don’t think she’s brilliant. I think she stooped to the lowest common denominator for the election. She lied and cheated as much as Trump supporters do, or want to do.