Calling Stoya’s statement defamatory means exactly that, “I did not rape Stoya and I can prove it in court.” It seems bloodless to a lay person, but it’s the strongest way of calling a person a liar that lawyers can deploy.

And yet it’s like the entire thread is disagreeing with you.

Nah, some kinks absolutely deserve to be shamed and that ridiculous “sex postive” attitude of all sex is great all the time thing needs to go.

Nope. Some kinks should be shamed. Pedophilia? Animal crushing?

kink shaming is not okay

except that many men convicted of serial rape when surveyed admit that they enjoy rape-simulation porn. there is definitely a connection between guys that consume rape simulation porn and actual rapists. i’m not saying every guy who likes rape porn is a rapist—but some of them definitely are.

Uh huh. And what about the dudes who jerk off to rape simulating porn? Are they sex positive feminists too?

Only on a site such as this would someone say that rape porn is not a part of rape culture.

Hey, how about not trotting out “sex-negative” in a post where someone in BDSM raped a woman despite her use of safewords, huh? Maybe realize that “sex-negative” is the new way to say “frigid” and stop using it, because the idea that we can’t discuss how damaging certain aspects of sex can be to women is horseshit.

Can we please stop pretending it’s as cut and dried as that?

Except women having rape fantasies is a thing completely outside a man’s choice to repeatedly simulate rape. Given the prevalance of rape and abuse - primarily of women - in sex work, porn, and BDSM, it’s relevant and valid to question the motivations of the men who choose to participate in them repeatedly and…

There’s nothing un-feminist about rape fantasies and I’m totally pro-kink, but I have trouble endorsing them as positive sexual outlets when they’re from the point of view of the rapist. Most porn is shot for men, marketed to men, including the videos to which I’m referring.

But being paid to perform simulated acts of slapping, choking, punching, etc. on a woman, just so another guy can get off isn’t exactly a positive expression to women. Sure it may be art, but really how does choking a woman (simulated or not) promote feminism.

No one has fantasies about their souls being crushed and their dignity being destroyed and then having flashbacks for years about that, which is what rape is. Please rephrase your comment and think about what kink and BDSM is.

He’s always creeped me out. Didn’t blink for a second to learn he’s a rapist.

I’m not into visual porn; smutty writing does it for me. But enough people raved about him that I gave it a try, once. He spat in the woman’s face and simulated raping her - no thanks. Not into guys who even pretend to enjoy that shit, and if that makes me not sex-positive, I can live with that.

If that’s all you took from Feminism 101, you overpaid.

Yeah, not the same thing.

It’s 2015, and we’re still using “pussy” as a pejorative?

I have 3 thoughts: