It sounds to me like the other folks are on Chen’s side. I hear a few saying “You should be fired.” Totally unacceptable behavior on the manager’s part, no matter what. Not only did she alienate this one customer, but she made it an extremely uncomfortable experience for everyone else in the store. I know,…

Yeah, I’d say it’s assertive instead of passive aggressive. She responded to aggression with assertion, which is ideal.

I really don’t see that as passive aggressive. “I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you.” Ok. You’re sorry - legit apology. That’s normal. Also, you didn’t hear the person. That’s a statement of fact and lets them know that it was unintentional. That’s cool and a normal thing to say and makes sense. “You don’t have to yell”…

That’s what you took away from this? She didn’t have to yell. That’s insane. If telling someone that is passive aggressive, then I don’t know what kind of VIP treatment you think this barista deserves when she’s literally humiliating customers for no reason.

Yeah, but sometimes the double whammy of paying for a service and then having the business offering you the exact opposite of that service leaves a sour taste that has to be rectified by more than just turning the other cheek.

Thank you. I watched the video thinking, “I have no idea what anyone is saying, but that is a beautiful cascade of hair.”

I think the guy is trying to mansplain why Melissa is so upset. Honestly, that might’ve been my least favorite part of the whole video.

Totally off topic, but Chen has beautiful hair!

I’ve always hated crowded coffee shops that call out people’s names (often after they’ve written them down wrong) and then get mad when you don’t immediately hear them. It feels shitty to have the failings of a disorganized system be blamed on you.

Kelly, there are so many people commenting in these threads about wanting to get into romance and wondering where to start...might you consider a series of “So You Want To Start Reading Romance” articles that include classics in various subgenres that modern readers will love like say Lord of Scoundrels and Bet Me,…

I just want to say I’m really enjoying this series of posts.

Kelly, thank you for writing so much about this topic !! It’s been so helpful for my own writing and got me back into reading them too. I used to be a strictly Norah Roberts/Judy Garwood/Rachel Gibson/Linda Howard reader- going to read my first Victoria Dahl book tomorrow. Keep up the great work !

Oh, for sure. It’s probably on the spectrum of body dysmorphia.

Not joking, very serious question: Isn’t there such a thing as size denial? Like dysmorphia, but in reverse? Or as a form of dysmorphia?

I know she only recently hired an all new team but could someone not sit down with her and say the whole thing about I stopped counting age at 17 and wearing the smallest clothes she can squeeze into should be consigned to the past. And that you need to rehearse for your shows and show up on time to commitments. She…

OMG. Mariah is like my friend in high school who refused to buy Tommy Hilfiger pants because she was a size larger in them (instead of her usual 4), and REFUSED to wear a size larger.

For me, not having things around the house that are snackable assures that I have to be motivated in order to feed myself. I either have to get up and make something myself, or I have to put on clothes, decide what I want (and if I’m ordering delivery, I have to decide between the zillion options I have), and then…

It’s pretty amazing how just not having crap in the house helps big time. We would have a few snacks (crackers, maybe some chocolate covered almonds) and whenever I’d go to the cabinet for cookies or ice cream or whatever, I’d have to settle on something else and that was totally ok. If there’s crap in the house, I’ll…

This really, really stupid advice helped me lose 30 pounds: Don’t buy anything bad. When I went grocery shopping, I didn’t buy any pop or any snacks that were ready to eat. If I wanted to eat something, I had to make it. Instead of stuffing my face from a chip bag, I had to make something, which meant prep and clean…