I’m pretty sure there’s a DIY on Pinterest for this necklace.

“I’m currently wearing a bright blue skirt covered in goddamn sailboats.”

Buffy? There’s a Church of Buffy?! Where do I convert?

“In the years since allegedly raping a 25-year-old woman at knifepoint, Giardala has lived in at least eleven different U.S. states and appears to have traveled out of the country dozens of times. He was arrested in Los Angeles carrying almost a dozen driver’s licenses and credit cards in different names.”

I hope the cop can’t sleep at night thinking of her face and her children. He could’ve saved her life, instead he left her to die. He should be charged with professional negligence.

Well, I for one applaud this new plan to prove to the government that life is so sacred to their shared delusion of a mystical being keeping score in the afterlife that the state should interfere with half it’s population’s decision on when to use their body to procreate. It’s a step up from planting bombs in women’s…

Your amazing daughter gets all the Sassy Points!

The Adam Sandler emails were my favorite part of the Sony Hack saga, where they were all “Why are the only movies Sony makes are Adam Sandler vehicles, he hasn’t been funny since Happy Gilmore” and on and on it went, oh it was great.

Do you live in North Carolina? Apparently it’s the leading state for urologists because of all the UTIs and kidney stones their population gets, something about the water.

This is the reason why when a candidate says “I’m a born again Christian!”, or hell, just touts their Christian bona fides as part of the reason to vote for them at all, I immediately decide to not vote for them.

A TARDIS totally beats Wienermobile and just about any other form of transport you can come up with, unless someone had a transporter pad from the Enterprise as a photo booth. >please, please, please someone tell me they had a transporter pad from the Enterprise built for their wedding, please!<

I’m sure Arpaio will be stocking the salad bar himself. Anyone else have visions of watery oatmeal in the morning and rice&beans at night, day after day after day after day? The man’s a walking human rights violation. But I guess if the prisoners wanted meat they shouldn’t have complained about the green baloney.

And he’ll spend the rest of his life less than 4 miles from Gillette Stadium, when the wind is right he’ll be able to hear the crowd on game days. I hope it eats at him.

“Jesus wept”

Isn’t this similar to the law that killed that poor woman, Savita Halappanavar in Ireland? The doctors knew the fetus was a goner but because there was still a heartbeat they let her die a slow painful death from sepsis as she begged over and over for days for the D&E that would’ve saved her life.

Probably explains why BuzzFeed keeps pushing that "Wash Your Face with Oil" article this week.

Come to New England in the Fall!

Who cares what platform they’re using to read as long as they’re reading! I don’t use an e-reader. I work online all day so my eyes are practically bleeding by the end of it, reading words on paper gives my eyes a break and I find I retain information when I read it from a hard copy. But that’s just me, my best friend…

If Rob Kardashian was “hooked on meth” he’d be a hell of a lot skinnier. It’s a hell of a drug.

How long are we going to pretend that Randy has a snowball’s chance in hell of actually getting his party’s nomination? ‘Cause I gotta say, I’m already sick of hearing him spout Libertarian circle jerk talking points.