It just might be my masterwork.

Han So Low

“Alexa, order some toilet paper. And can you put a rush on that.. like REALLY fast?”.

“Alexa, order some toilet paper. And can you put a rush on that.. like REALLY fast?”.

Wait, Jenny Slate is single?

“If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day, you’re the asshole”.

I’m looking forward to someone pushing your mom out of the way to catch the last on-duty taxi in a rainstorm. “Sorry you were too small and slow to stand your ground, ma’am”.

Gotta buy a ticket to the tour for that one :)

Makes sense, given Lebowski’s fondness for White Russians.

Exactly. The real danger is having a man ‘in charge’ who’ll listen to anyone who boosts his ego by letting him think that whatever scheme is in the offing was his own idea.

Offer him two billion dollars or so, he’d take it

Christ, we could all use an ESC key right about now.

It’s from the movie “Domino”

If it doesn’t, your critical thinking has failed you.

Found the duck.

Man compliments woman on smile = gross

Geez, I wonder what she thinks of scandal-plagued Lee Byung-hun?

-1 for lack of scarf covering mouth.

“Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer”