Mine was exactly like a black eye, but just the inner 1/3 of a normal human fist caused one. So people would look and go “What the hell fell on your eye?” and wouldn’t believe it when I said it was a kitty punch.

I like both, but the German one is more emotional, isn’t it?

Maybe they are hiding a charger for your cell phone. It would be useful and energetic.

I can now include “99 Red Balloons” and “The Safety Dance” in all my playlists again.

Best fashion of the 80s was for me Jerry Hall, cause I am more into sleek with shoulder pads than pouffy, but that might be just me.

She was so freaking adorable and radiant, but that dress is for a toilet paper doll. Sure, a classy toilet paper doll, but still.

They should start reporting like “127,000 Florida Men not arrested today”. Might be easier to go the other way around with this.

They always eat the eyeballs first. It is a delicacy.

My cat punched me and gave me a black eye once, so yes.

Classic dance is absolutely not sexual, and I think “regular” modern dance isn’t either. The problem is the Abby Lee Miller-ification of the dance world if you will. Cause she has those girls doing things I wouldn’t be comfortable watching an adult woman do outside of a burlesque setting.

No offense to this lady, but I don’t think she is escort service level. Craigslist independent contractor, probably.

WTF? I missed that one, but now I wanna watch cause it is so bad.

The shorts worn in regular practice are not the booty shorts worn in the Olympics, though. They are like running shorts. But regardless, I think sexualized moves/face are worse than showing the body. Swimming is done while wearing suits that show the body, but the swimmers are not told to act sexually. That is the…

It sounds like a fever dream* one has while falling asleep after watching both Discovery Channel and Lifetime, but alas it is a real movie. Where Charlie Sheen and Gina Gershon are married and get trapped in an elevator as they go meet their lawyer at the Twin Towers on 9/11.

The snake got so much cocaine in its system, it undulated out of there lightning fast!

There are children’s bikinis where the top is more like a short tank, and the bottoms have skirts and other child stuff like that. I think those are ok. But yeah, I see children’s bikinis with padded bras for sale and I am like, WTF. The semi-tankinis are a godsend for my long-torsoed youngest, though, cause she can’t…

Solution: put the girls in martial arts, track, or oh, any other activity without sexualization for kids, like volleyball. It is not hard.

Yeah, this box looks cool but I’d like to know where the fuck I am going.

I am pretty sure the brides on SYTD are exactly the type of ghosts that keep opening doors and making noises when dead. Always looking for attention.

Isn’t this sorta like that hot mess 9/11 movie with Charlie Sheen and Gina Gershon? Though I suppose that one is divorce set in tragedy rather than romance, but same idea.