I know the joke you are thinking of. Do not make this joke. Everyone has already made this joke.

I'm really disappointed that there isn't a Jacquesun on that list!

I hate to imagine what would have happened if Cain was making a club sandwich. Everyone knows the Dodgers contribute heavily to Big Frilly Toothpick.

Wasn't it Cus D'Amato who instilled all the head movement into Tyson's defense? It is pretty clear the more video I watch that Tyson's defense was light years head of Maidana. I contend that you could draw some parallels to their offensive strategy. Granted, with Tyson's power, developing a stellar defense was the…

I have to wonder if D'Amato would have kept some of the enablers (see: King, Don) at bay.

Maidana fights like someone who's fought before, sure. He fights like the perpetually angry, pinch-faced kid with a bad haircut and an abusive father who used to beat you up after school as a way of (you realized many years later) lashing out at the world to express his inner pain. He fights with a driven urge to…

No....only as it relates to hockey teams in Minnesota.

Can we call it the "Okposo Curse"?

It should also be mentioned that goalie Darcy Kuemper had to leave the game late in the third due to injury, forcing the Wild to put in the highly erratic Ilya Bryzgalov cold.

I figured a picture was worth a thousand words.

Silver notably dodged a reporter's question over why the NBA did not act until now.

I decided I wasn't pretentious enough to drink Miller Fortune the second I heard it pronounced "Miller Fortchoon" in the TV commercial.

The other 39% of Minnesotans answered "at least it's not Wisconsin".

Perhaps they are allowing him the opportunity to develop some coaching strategies that are outside the box.

In Minnesota's constant quest for validation, the Minneapolis Star Tribune also posted a story about this. http://www.startribune.com/lifestyle/2561…

Oh, so it's a tribute to the French military? Now it makes sense!

#AWOLMets

To make matters worse, that sac bunt occurred with two strikes.

So would this be the appropriate combo meal for the Flatizza?

Isn't this the verbal beatdown equivalent of Chris Br.....