That's not his curmudgeon routine. That's his Shawn Kemp routine.

I hate that you have feelings

I just want you to hold me.

Sam: "I dunno, Coach. Even washed-up golfers are giving me shit. This is a really difficult time for me..."

a hacker is sending out tweets from my account - @elkpga

That's fine. You just keep putting up barriers. And Lolo Jones will keep knocking them down.

What exactly is Deadspin, for that matter?

I loved that show!

Even more adorable? The puppy's name is Ruffner.

Great. As if there weren't enough heels in professional wrestling already.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me."

[stunned silence]

Besides, if you were to compare a college football player to Rosa Parks, the obvious pick would be Eric LeGrand. That dude gets to sit wherever the hell he wants.

I think it depends on whether the word ends with an "-a" or an "-er." For example:

Pool basketball videos are the white man's WorldStar.

"Revenge! You crossed me one too many times."

All that hard work for nothing, Brad Paisley and LL Cool J.

That's like threatening to fight every heterosexual at a Melissa Etheridge concert.

How far can you punt a football?