I first read that headline as “Anthony Weiner’s Dog” and now I’m incredibly sad on multiple fronts.

It really was wonderful of us to make Tim Hardaway Jr look like Tim Hardaway Sr. I am so looking forward to watching these Wizarding basketball men 81 more times this year.

Boy, the once-veiled white ethnonationalism of the GOP is on full display this election.

But seriously - if you have an opportunity to insult a decorated war veteran you have to take it, right?

Hell, just being the nominee would have brought out an onslaught.

We purposely withhold Uber services from some cities so that when you finally get them, you don’t notice the price increase. I mean, that’s Jewish 101, basic entry-level stuff.

Ugh, Orthodox Jews are the worst. They give other Jews a really bad name. Especially with the fact that they are aggressively conservative with their views.

Clearly you haven’t seen the meme Nazis on Twitter that tweet photos of gas chambers at Jewish journalists who dare report negatively on Trump, and for that I envy you.

Yeah, same (also Jew). I’ve been curious for a while about how Trump’s most fervent neo-Nazi supporters reconcile that his glorious Aryan daughter Ivanka married a filthy Jew.

In addition to having lots of anti-Semite friends, Trump made speeches to Jewish groups and told them they didn’t control him and that he’s a negotiator like them. I feel like Trump would have gone with overt anti-Semitic statements by now if he really wanted to.

If you were a Jew then you would know when the Jews were going to be dragged into this as you guys have this stuff all preplanned centuries in advance. DONT LIE!

As a Jew, I’ve been predicting that if Trump somehow gets elected and the economy (inevitably) crashes under his deregulation, you’ll really see them take aim at the jews.

First they came for the sheriffs.

As a Jew, I’ve been wondering this whole election “when are the Jews going to get dragged into this?”

You probably went to a public school, kids at private schools don’t do menial labor.

So, my first baseball game was a Cubs game back in 85?86? My old man pulled me out of school to take me. I barely remember it. Since that time, I’ve probably been to more White Sox games than Cubs games. I’m totally pulling for the Cubs, but when it comes to going the game I’ll pick the White Sox any day and here’s…

Remember the rice hats all the Cubs fans wore when they had Fukudome? I do.

I feel like absolute truth takes a lot of heat out of this take.

So I’m not particularly well versed with this situation, but what is the breakout of these workers who are students?

Both embody Chicago. With the Cubs you forgot suburbanites who call four square blocks of bars “the city,” but with the White Sox you forgot the virulent racism/homophobia and babyrage inferiority complex. Chicago sports fans embody a rich tapestry of shitty humans, no need to pick one in front of the other