Whenever someone mentions Bob Dole I just cant stop thinking about the exchanging of long protein strands.

Church camp is where my husband felt his first boob. He also witnessed a blowjob. My children are NEVER going to church camp.

In September, 32 girls in Chicago went on a religious retreat together. By November, their text message chain was riddled with racial slurs that got five of them suspended or expelled from their high school

As soon as I win the Euro Jackpot (fat chance...) I’m gonna buy this beauty

I could probably swing this one. Bit of a fixer-upper! http://www.groupe-mercure.com/en/buy/for-sale-chateau-haute-garonne-10503-9214vm.html

Well, shit. Now I know what I will be doing the last two hours of work. OMG.

Do want to be house castlemates?

How very Miss Havisham.

I could create a studio apartment in that dining room and live there happily whilst the rest of the place moldered away around me in a pleasing sort of way

Current owners have that thing way overfurnished but I could definitely fix that

thank you for the link! I’m always googling “castle’s for sale” and your link is great!

I never knew what my purpose in life was until now. But now I see it clearly. I am meant to purchase this 16th century abbey for the bargain-basement price of 400,000 euro and lovingly rehab every single inch of it. http://www.groupe-mercure.com/en/buy/for-sale-chateau-puy-de-dome-13559-70163vm.html

Well I’ll be damned. I mean it’s not like I have a million Euro lying around, but I’m kind of amazed that’s about all you need to have your very own piece of French paradise. There must be some kind of catch if you’re a foreigner though.

Well shoot. I am now going to spend the rest of my afternoon looking at French real estate and dreaming of buying a chateau.

For any Jezzies in the DC area, please consider coming out and supporting Comet. My family was there Saturday, less than 24-hours before this idiot walked in with an AR-15 assault rifle. We were with friends and their child, supporting this beloved local business...and now we will be going there every damn week to…

Guys....let’s get them to boycott pizza.  They’re already protesting Kellogg’s (so most breakfast food), Pepsi, GrubHub, Netflix, Oreos, I’ve lost count.

If cops and prosecutors cannot get the paperwork straight on slam dunks like this then, horrible as it sounds, they deserve to lose. Those procedures and technicalities are important, they protect us as well as him.

We should totally do something about this (wind whistles) (coyote howls) (waits 20 minutes) (another local news story is republished) we should totally do something about this

Just imagine how she is going to react when someone tells her where pistachios come from...

Every time I here about that movie I wonder if it’s this one or the James Spader car accident porn one. It’s never the James Spader.