That was my first though, but it turns out "protagonize" is not a word...yet. I claim it as my own now! ;)

I suppose, but how often do you need to open that? You open it, check out the tools, and use them, putting them back when you're done. During the time you're using the tools, the lock is not using power.

Protagonist is not a verb. That sentence should be "A less noble effect of this feature would be saving the embarrassment to the moronic protagonists in the neverending stream of fail videos on YouTube."

That's unaffected. The question is why didn't Earth have much more water to begin with, and this explains that. Comets, etc. all added the water we do have afterwards, and that has nothing to do with this.

Jeeze, I don't even remember my first time. I remember my first computer had Windows 95 on it, so it must have been between 1995 and 1998 (I also had a Windows 98 PC when it was released)...so I was between 5 and 8. I remember a few pieces of software I used to love on it:

If a simple hammer would work to open a Master Lock, we wouldn't need bolt cutters.

And making it impossible for anyone to open their locker without bolt-cutters? You're such a nice person.

It probably would last an extremely long time, since it doesn't use any power unless you're unlocking it or setting a code. And I'm sure there's an indication light if the battery is low so you can unlock it, replace the battery, and relock it.

It's not smart. The smart thing to do would be to use a real grill and just never ignite it. At least then it would look like a grill instead of a shelf.

It would be just as safe and practical as long as it's not ignited. And then it would look like a grill instead of a shelf.

I doubt it. The response wouldn't have been delayed if that were the case. Unless it was designed to be sent on a delay to make it seem human when it's not...but it has a woman's name, and this company knows that women aren't technologically literate enough to program a system that clever. But they're PRETTY, and…

What I find worst about this whole thing is that she actually had a technical problem. One of the two buds didn't work at all. And they responded by saying, basically, "Yeah, that's how it's supposed to be." No, it's not, you PR moron, now let the customer speak with a grown-up.

I feel like you know nothing about radios...

Like porn?

This is cool. I don't have many apps that have in-app purchases (I suppose some TTR4 tracks would be nice). What stood out to me was the quote saying the guy's server has only 512MB of RAM. That's just sad. I feel for him, and if I had money to spare, I'd donate to his cause. I have my own 4GB laptop, but my mother's…

What already happened? New versions of Windows will run MS-DOS things for the most part, but there's no emphasis on that, and if it doesn't work there's no support for it.

Oh. Did I inadvertently make a Simon & Garfunkel reference? I've never listened to them, so if I did, it wasn't on purpose :P .

"...demure outdoor sports involving shuttlecocks and balls." Ah, Victorian-era wordplay :D .