Lorde!

I remember when Beyonce was black.

Oh my god, the forearms. I'm SUCH a sucker for a good forearm. I didn't take in a single word of EU Law last year because my lecturer rolled up his sleeves at the beginning of every lecture (It was his "let's begin" signal, and oh boy did we girls shut up fast).

Mark did not write for Jezebel during Amanda Bynes' breakdown and has not published any mocking/snarky/messed up things about Amanda Bynes. So give him the benefit of the doubt.

"Apollo went to prison for racketeering which is really a white collar crime. He’s no different from Martha Stewart." Ms. Phaedra Parks, ESQ.

Really, Grey's? Season 12? It's time to let go. With Sandra Oh leaving I'm about done anyway, since her relationship with Meredith is what made me fall in love with the show anyway. I'm 90% sure they're trying to transition into a "Grey's Anatomy: New Generation" shit with the interns, who are so annoying I can't…

My thoughts exactly!!

Black woman + white man = all the power to them, honey. Any and all color combos are fabulous by me!

Yes, the duct tape look was pretty horrible ;)

Fuck, I new Totally Spies was real life. IF ONLY I KNEW THAT FASHION DESIGNER SPY WAS A REAL JOB THEN.

My fiancée and I realized how "old" we are when we started calling annoying teenagers "youths" unironically. 30Rock Style.

I did that with the Harry Potter books. A coworker and I got the book at the same time (book 5?) and four months later, I reference the death. She looks up at me in complete shock, and I realize my mistake and instantly try to play it off as taunting her.

They're like Zynga Junior

I for one am shocked that the company behind a game designed to make money by taking advantage of peoples' worst psychological impulses is capable of this sort of behavior.

Candy Crush was made popular by casual and nongamers. Most never played Bejeweled 12 years ago and think Candy Crush is new and original.

What if y'all give retouching like a three month break here on Jezebel? Maybe?

I guess you can still be godly and want to suck dick."