if students are in a situation where they can’t pay for lunch, they’re given one slice of american cheese on a hamburger bun along with a small milk.

In case you see any of the undeserving poor, you can pass this along to them.

Yes, but they look funny with cigarettes hanging out of their mouths.

Die Nationalelf

judging by the rest of NBC’s programming lineup, this interview will be for a job as the host of the new NBC reality TV program, “So You Think You Can Get Away With Murder?”

You have any weirdo acquaintances that won’t eat goat cheese because they smell goat when they eat it? I do and I feel really bad for those people.

Whenever I’m in Houston, I think about trains. Or, really, any and all options to get me out of that sweltering, characterless, strip-mall.

It’s built on Houston’s old train yard, right next to old Union Station. There are train tracks all over this city. The city seal has a big locomotive at the center of it.

You should get up on some snofrisk. Cream cheese made from 90% goat milk, 10% cow milk.

Round saltines...can’t believe it took until now to come up with that idea.

Seriously though, landscape mode.

Own those pudding cups. I'm going to turn 30 soon but I still pack 2 of those little cheese-and-cracker-stick things from grade school in my work lunch.

You know, I think it’s easy to get all angry and called people close to Caitlyn transphobic and hateful- but it would be really, really hard to come to terms with someone transitioning if it was your child or husband or father- after all this time. I think it’s really fair to say “yes, I support their happiness and…

As a Knicks fan I fully expect that to work into 2 Miami titles followed by Wade signing a 7 year max contract with New York for the low low price of 2 unprotected first round picks.

He wouldn’t have approved. He’s a sandals sort of guy.

For all those bringing up the original title IX complaints against the creepy prof, STAAAAAAAAHP. Kipnis’ original article was an analysis of the rationale behind a new university policy prohibiting sexual relationships between consenting adults, not an apology for or defense of a rapist.

Because it draws attention to the fact that sexual assault on campus is not treated as seriously as it should by college administrations and frat houses. I’m behind that idea. I’m also behind the choice to take mattress to graduation ceremonies as an activist thang.

You know, I was totally in there supporting them, even taking the mattress to graduation. But filing a Title IX against her and the person accompanying her to the meetings (which was his job), was a dick move worthy of the patriarchy.

“I was just moving you guys”