Show of hands, who read that as eats his own shit at a first glance?

Underrated and overrated are the worst categories in sports journalism. “Is Steph Curry’s defense better or worse than your perception of the public’s perception of Steph Curry’s defense?”

Don’t apologize for using your brain, just stop doing it.

Were you the guy standing behind me at the DMV today? Longest 10 minute wait of my life.

Oh, so when La Russa squeezes into a booth unannounced, he’s “defending the truth.” But when I do it, I’m “drunk” and “not welcome in this IHOP anymore.”

Said Briles: “Originally the University gave me two weeks to decide to resign, but in true Baylor fashion they decided to go ahead and fuck me whether they had my consent or not.”

Baylor President Ken Starr will also be fired

Eh, I mean, the Warriors outscored the Thunder in those games, which tends to be a more reliable indicator of which team did basketball better.

“I come from a long line of proud dipshits”

This is so fucking stupid and I love it. The asininity of youth has finally won me over.

The Ardrey Kell High School talent show: You pay for the whole seat, but you’ll only need the edge

Mine eyes have seen the glory and the coming of the Lord... *weeps*

The Warriors hot takes are going to be the worst part about them losing.

They won the title last year, and won 73 games in a good conference this year.

Were you not here yesterday? They had, like, four Roger Goodell stories.

Some would say tattooing such a small child is irresponsible, but I say go for it if she’s already got the mustache.

So a Marlins fan expected a certain level of service, only to get a product that was a cheap, terribly diluted imitation of what was promised? No way he could have seen that coming.

Obligatory:

Steph Curry is wasting his talents on this basketball thing. I say without a shadow of a doubt he’d be the greatest beer pong player who ever walked the earth.

There should never be an “Escalator Temporarily Out of Order” sign. Just “Escalator Temporarily Stairs: Sorry for the Covenience.”