“LaMarcus, think about it! On any given day you could be passing the ball to Kobe and never seeing it again that possession in front of Victoria’s Secret supermodels, or Tom Hanks, or Lady Gaga, or even Michael Eisner! It could be Kate Upton who hears Kobe yelling at you to fucking pass him the ball when he’s open or…

It took literally three minutes of Kobe Bryant for LaMarcus Aldridge to be like, “Uhh...thanks for taking the time I’ll see y’all later.”

“You get to wear purple and it doesn’t make you look gay...not that there’s anything wrong with that.”

As a Blazers fan I was really dreading Aldridge going to LA. He’s from Texas, so him going closer to home to play for one of the best coaches of all time and probably win a championship or two in San Antonio is hard to really get mad at. But if he’d gone to the Lakers, he would’ve been fucking dead to me. Jabbing a…

I love this. I knew the reports of “went really well” meant LaMarcus smiled and nodded politely, maybe threw in an awkward laugh, and they all took that as “yes! we got him!”

Has there ever been anybody as bitter about anything as Donovan was and still is about being left off that WC team?

Hope Solo, undefeated against enemies foreign and domestic (the latter being her nephew).

FIFA officials giving a helping hand to the Americans?

Our back four is 3/4 as kraut-y as theirs.

Originally this was a "the NFL wants players to be slaves," but reading it now, I see it's about college football. Except the food part.

That always amuses me no end. “Swearing is a terrible sin, so I will never do it! Instead, I will substitute a few symbols for letters in common swear words, because I believe the god I worship is so stupid he doesn’t understand what I’m really saying.”

Assuming the kid will ever learn to read is kind of putting the cart before the horse.

Has she said who the father is, or is she waiting to go on Maury?

“I’ve been trying my hardest to keep my chin up on this one.”

lol “BONUS” pick. you realize he didn’t get that pick for free, right? like he had to give up actual assets for it? the fact the Sixers knew he wouldn’t play doesn’t change the fact that he was a lottery pick who won’t suit up for the team for at least two seasons.

Although you could reasonably argue that THIS 76ers franchise, right now, the one he has to play for, might be the worst iteration of an NBA franchise of all time.

Since some people have asked: this bout was conducted under the unified rules, which state no boxer can be saved by the bell in any round. So as long as Vargas knocked Bradley down before the bell rang, Bradley would still have needed to answer the referee’s ten count. Which, I mean, who knows how long Pat Russell’s…

Karma for hosting the World Cup on fucking field turf.

You never met them; they’re from Canada.

I’m no defender of Costas, but might this be a joke (admittedly, not a great one) at the expense of those athletes who seem to take themselves so seriously that they believe God is helping them pitch, dunk, and catch? The comment seems tongue-in-cheek.