There's something deeply disturbing and depressing about the Burger King pictured in this post. It's as if the thing is just plopped down in the middle of nowhere, sitting quietly with no foot or automobile traffic.

Forgive the heresy, and I do so adore corgis, but they must be the only breed of dog that is far cuter grown than in puppy form.

Gotta love when guys like Alex Jones casually throw words like "physiologically" into the middle of their insane rants. We all know that if you toss out a multi-syllabic science-y sounding word as part of your nonsense spew, everything you say gains the sheen of truth and erudition.

Derivations of "evolution" are…

I will confess that when I was a kid, TGIF was one of my favorite restaurants. I was addicted to the kid's menu pizza bites.

Luckily, I eventually turned 11.

It's a shame the Mandy-Moore-as-an-actress thing didn't work out. I actually really liked her.

Heh. "Human sexuality is a dazzling spectrum."

I would have gone to more frat parties if they had served lemonade and coffee cake.

Put the rhyming direction away when writing your screenplay, dammit.

That last guy waited a few days before the "why haven't you responded" message and a full 24 hours after that before breaking out the "bitch." Who says there are no gentlemen on Tinder?

I think Aziz Ansari had a bit about how texting totally changed his internal timeline for talking with women. You get so used to this almost instantaneous back-and-forth that any unscheduled break in the communication becomes almost catastrophic. I know my imagination tends to fill in the blanks with the worst…

In Minnesota's defense, they did all due diligence before making this decision. They read the witness statements, reviewed the indictment, examined past precedent and made the informed, reasoned decision that their back-up running backs suck.

"Because a real American patriot has a colon full of red, white, and blue polyps"

There's probably a word in German for laughing while being utterly disgusted. Thanks, Erin.

Somehow the Browns will make the playoffs, and somehow they will still fire Mike Pettine after a wild card round loss.

Terez Paylor does great work at The Kansas City Star covering the Chiefs, even if I think there's been some kind of typo every time I see his name. Good video breakdowns and clear writing on complicated issues.

I don't know if I've ever seen a Daily Show correspondent improve more dramatically from her first appearance as Jessica Williams. She's become pure comedy gold.

I enjoyed that too. Based on Stewart's reaction and the way Williams broke up after saying it, I'm guessing there's some sort of backstory there.

Simmons already has a big new contract. He got one in spring training.

Am I wrong, or is ZZ Ward going to be a huge star in a few years? Like, "sell out the biggest arena in a major city" huge?

I remember being really, really impressed with Taylor Swift when she hosted SNL; she actually carried a few sketches, which is unusual for a musician-turned-host. There was a particularly funny bit where she played a braces-wearing teenager doing a PSA about the dangers of distracted parental driving.

She was also the…

Not that this is the most productive response to what Ablow said, but I'm pretty sure Michelle Obama could twist him into a pretzel.

And then put the pretzel away, because she's already had her snack for the day.