@holy holes batman: Most of which would get you killed in an actual survival situation. I'm no pro, but I've had my share of training. Bear is a reckless showboat. A showboat, I say!

@sgtzim: You know, I completely forgot about the piss-poor makeup. There are so many reasons to hate that movie, that you tend to lose track. But I remember watching those scenes and thinking, "What, they didn't have budget for a decent makeup artist." Properly not, given all of the film they had to pay for. But…

@Dragonfang18: Thank you for summing up my high school years. I think I'll go cry now. Jerk.

@OctaneHugo: Airliner Pilot of DOOM: I respectfully disagree. You can watch the cut version. Much shorter. Still bad. Somehow worse, because the once-coherent-but-still-bad storyline becomes incoherent and bad. I have a great affinity for the themes of the films as my grandfathers grew up in the Jewish slums of NY and…

Regarding Once Upon a Time in America: I strongly urge anybody reading this post to go out and pick up this movie. Upon receiving this 4.5 hour cinematic masturbation session, be sure to smash this pretentious excuse for a film into pieces. Then burn the pieces and bury them. Dig up the remains, piss on them, and bury…

@zimbabwaenquadrillionare: That's just ridiculous. Nobody reads Time anymore...

@blackcat12: Well, you don't want her talking about it, do you?

@moonshadowkati: Hooray! My years in the Marijuana Club for Suburban White Kids have not gone to waste! Seriously, hearts from some of my favorite commentators. Thanks!

@Buzz Mega: Kind of pointless. I mean, you motivate them by the desire for snack brains, but you also make it difficult for them to get off the zombie couch (zombie Gilligan's Island is on) . So the whole thing pretty much cancels itself out.

"Dude. Dude, Dude. I know. Just listen, OK. Just listen, OK? Ok? OK? So listen. OK. So, like, instead of. Dude. Dude, are you listening? So instead of, like, and alarm or anything, you know what we should do? You know what we should do? Dude. Bears. We should totally train some bears to watch the weed. Dude, I know.…

@Chrysolite: You should have followed that up with a viewing of Running Man. Your move, creep.

@Oranges w/ Cheese has 2 cats! ahahaha.: But why do you think that rent is cheap? Lack of services is one of the reasons. I imagine that you don't have access to a lot of things you would if you lived closer to an urban center. Isn't that one of the trade offs you made when you chose to live in a more rural area? I'm…

@Yerzriknot: Access to medical care is a far cry from access to broadband. I think a better comparison would be between access to air travel and access to cross-country bus service.

@ianoo: The difference between the government laying the lines or providing incentives via tax breaks is semantic in my opinion. Either way, it boils down to capital outlay. Money. It really doesn't matter who's digging in the dirt at that point. That being said, if something like this were to take place, I would…

@ianoo: There's no market for a Walmart in distant, rural areas. That likely sucks for people. Should the government open up a Walmart? I live in a super crappy city where no grocery stores will operate. This is a major issue since it is the very poor who have the least means to drive to the 'burbs to access food. The…

@OCEntertainment: But the heart of the matter is whether or not broadband is a necessity or a luxury. Or rather, where on the spectrum of necessity/luxury does it fall.

It's good to bring these issues to the forefront and for people to discuss them. My opinion on the matter mirrors what others have said, so I won't chime in. However, Adam's argument is fallacious. He asks us to imagine not having access to the internet and all of the vital activities that we would not be able to…

@Charliehorse: Porn?

Maybe his name is Mulva?

Should Google, indeed anybody other than perhaps the X-Men, have a spokesperson named "Mistique?"