4. Has Ben Affleck ever met an autistic person?

Deandre Jordan is more of a Maverick than John McCain.

To be fair, a black guy playing golf is pretty uppity, is the kind of thing racist people think.

Fattest president since Taft.

For a guy who bitched and moaned about President Obama playing golf ad nauseam, he sure does golf a lot.

Fattest president since Taft? Fattest president since Taft.

Reminds me of the last fight I got in. This guy at a bar was looking at me. So I said, “What the fuck you looking at asshole?” He looks at me and says, “Nothing.” I stood up. “Damn right, you better not be.” This guy had no business fucking with a guy like me, so I said, “ You have no business fucking with a guy like…

Latrine-o Royale, Goldshower, and of course, From Russia with Love

Pissin Impossible

I’ve never lived in Boston and also have no desire to see this trash-ass movie. Like I won’t watch it when it’s on HBO Now a year from now, it’s 11:00 p.m. on a Friday, and I’m drunk and my wife is asleep on the couch.

The only Ross that had more fun with wood was Bob.

Soooo...Mt St. Helens seems like it should be hot but is actually cold inside?

Al Davis in hell right now

When the chef held that pregnant pause after taking a bit of the crumble, I was convinced we were finally going to get somebody to say the food sucked.

Dammit Drew, has anyone at GQ ever met you in-person? If so, we need to discuss a serious overhaul of the HR vetting process.

Happy trails, you magnificent cocksnot.

WHY COULDN’T IT BE THE CARDINALS?!

#fatlivesmatter

#allseatsmatter

See? This is what happens when you divert money from athletics to unnecessary programs like music and art!