she just seems like she truly believes in love and good things but also would cut a punk if they crossed her/her husband/her friends.

bruh Faith Hill and Miranda Lambert both looked like they were fucking. there. for. it. which solidifies the inkling i’ve always had that i’d like them if i met them in real life. (i am not a country fan so idgaf about their music, they just seem so tough).

also i’ve always loved Natalie Maines’ voice but i never…

i went “oh hell yaaas” in my head when i read this story. Martha is exacting af, and it’s gotten her to where she is.

heeey! had a good night last night, but that means i went to my serving shift hungover today. womp womp.

riiiight?! “Dangerous Woman” drives me bonkers bc none of the fucking sections of the song go together. it’s 4/5 songs in one. same with that one Zayne song i’ve heard in ubers a million times. something about bed all day. maybe battle days. idk he’s mushmouthed too.

the big monster machine thing was like “wha?” and Bernard is mosdef a robot.

spread it around like wildfire, but remember that you heard it from me first ;)

but how do do?! i think about bringing it up and i break into a sweat bc i don’t want to make things weird!

thanks, coined it myself ;)

anybody want to talk about the AMAZINGNESS that is Westworld? bc omg.

unrelated: how far into dating before you bring up the “so are you my boyfriend or what?” question. bc i absolutely adore the guy i’ve been seeing for a little over 2 months (10 weeks, not that i’m keeping track) and am ready to hang up my ho shoes…

i like that Salma is just so unbelievably, astonishingly gorgeous, that the only insult he could come up with was “too short.” even somebody as grotesque as him couldn’t throw a “valid” insult at her.

THIS. GOD. THIS RIGHT HERE.

“my guys won’t get off their Barcaloungers and your uterus is prepared to kill the ones that do!”

no. no. no.

it’s not even 2 pm here and i’m now stuck to my chair and do not want to go into other rooms bc i’m so creeped out.

oh holy jesus tapdancing christ. that’s horrifying.

what is a Black Eyed Child i don’t want to Google but i need to know how terrified to be.

oh FUCK NO.

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS.

am now miffed that the squeeze will be here tonight bc damn it, now i can’t hide under my covers and read these all night! that’s my tradition!

thanks, boo boo. I don’t think it’s going to be an issue in the long run, but it’s always nice to ask around the Jezebel camp :)