This was down the hall from my grandma’s 95th birthday party ...

Guess which one he is ...

I made it 1:45 before I couldn’t take it anymore.

Ever since I was a little kid my mom has been a fervent objector to being asked if she would like the “Boy toy” or “Girl toy” whenever she would order a Happy Meal at McDonald’s.

My religion requires my employees who don’t believe in providing contraception to be sterilized so we remove their genes from the next generation.