I feel like Drake is the pass-around dude between Nikki, Ri-Ri and Serena Williams (before she got engaged) when they need some in-between-boyfriends dick. And all of the ladies are totally cool with it and just laugh and laugh when Drake gets caught up in his feelings like an idiot.

#makefriendshipgreatagain

I’m giving you a star. Only because that was bitchy and I’ve had an annoying morning thus far.

“National zoo, you have failed this kitty!”

“My name is Ollie the Bobcat and after five years trapped in the National Zoo...”

Aka “the cautionary tale of Gretchen Mol”

Dakota Johnson.

I wonder if Sebastian & Margot are going to have to reenact the wedding video?

Nancy Kerrigan held up one of our games for 40 minutes because she decided she needed to practice for longer on time we had reserved...she had 30 or so 12 year old boys giving her the evil eye the whole time...

Most were saying, “Not this white woman,” or “No one I know!” I’d say, “[Fifty-three percent] of white women voted for Trump. That means someone you know, someone who is in close community with you, voted for Trump. You need to organize your people.”

What say you, cheerleaders?

Exactly. He’s only interested in this hoax as far as its ability to make the right look stupid.

Tertiary q: why does this man look like alt-right Jon Snow

He’s trying desperately to fill seats. Two for the price of one?

Somehow a man impersonating a politician being serenaded by a man impersonating a musician seems so perfect!

Up the ass. No lube. No spit. No foreplay. Rough. Very very rough.

Who would want work with a bunch of weirdos who watch a monkey fuck a deer then went yeah the deer wanted it.

Get your filthy cock out of me, you damned dirty ape!