The Pareto nature of most professional sports, unfortunately, is baked into the design. As butt as the NFL is, they are the only league where a third of the league has a legit chance of winning at the beginning of the season.

Hi Steve Bannon!

Wow. I’m blown away at the football acumen it took to foresee that Peyton Manning would be a good football player.

The fact that your team sucks ass is not my problem. Elway bills himself as some kind of talent-hunting savant, and holding him to a standard is totally appropriate.

Name a successful piece of the Broncos offense that Elway is responsible for.  

Name an offensive player who has impact, at any position, that Elway has drafted. Good luck!

Denver (and Colorado more generally outside of Colorado Springs and the eastern half of the state where nobody lives), is pretty blue now.

John Elway is on my fucking list, man. If it weren’t for the blind loyalty of this fan base, he’d have been run out on a rail after last year. Between 1) the Trump humping, 2) the failure to get Kaepernick in here as a backup (see number 1), 3) a failure to draft/sign anyone of consequence on the OL over the past 3…

So it began in 1997. Grandma Ghetro bought a brand new Metro LSI. She had been a loyal Honda driver, and it was supposed to be a Del Sol, but the F&I guy at the Honda place apparently pulled some nonsense on Grandma and she took off before signing on the dotted line.

I dunno man. Ask the police department in Colorado Springs, as well as the State Police in both Illinois and Indiana about Mr. Ghetro’s in-line three Metro.

It’s mostly a gut sense, albeit based on seeing a lot of people in various states of trauma. His quality of movement was just very limited, both in terms of fluidity and range of motion. There was obvious tension anytime he went to twist and lift at all (such as picking up his kids or putting items on the conveyor…

This is timely. I’m not into wrestling, but I am a doctor, and I saw Kurt Angle today at the Pittsburgh airport - outside of him just seeming like a genuinely nice person (fist bumping the TSA agents, carrying his daughter through the metal detector, etc.), I was struck by how traumatized his presentation was. I…

Clay Thompson. Klay Thompson.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LEWIS! Please come and compete in one NASCAR race, kneel during the anthem, then beat everyone by half aa lap.

Donald?

Finally. Someone figured out how to get the superstars to compete in the dunk contest. Thank you

It would be really perfect to just continue the pregame shootaround. It can be reframed as “continuing my preparation” and “putting the team first”, putting any offended dickhead in a semantic bind.

“Rabbi Schmuli”

*shakes head excitedly and taps self on nose*

There’s a private sports factory ...er.... high school in Denver that has not only officially licensed merch, but has sponsors like Adidas and Muscle Milk. Their facilities are nicer than the ones I had in college. It’s insane.