With green fender guards and a speaker making exhaust sounds. Perhaps a plastic cover over the Frunk that says “HEMI”

If they create a proper eTorque Death Machine Sportscar with 1 million lbs/ft of torque and all the horsepowhaz - I’ll spend all the monies.

If I’m going to be limited on range, may as well make every drop of eJuice count.

Somebody in marketing got a bonus for the line about the charger making the Charger quicker. That’s as far as Dodge got with its EV program.

I thought I detected a reference to Al Bundy in there. The difference is, Al Bundy STILL wouldn’t buy anything that didn’t resemble his POS Dodge.

Not every brand can be Subaru so if this is what it takes to get the other half of the population into more efficient cars I’m fine with it

CI\             /IC

Personally, I’ll fight it until the day I die. I try to drive slightly faster than the cars around me because I don’t want to sit next to Karen trying to text her best friend Becky at 70mph for 5 miles, barely keeping the car in her lane.

I don’t see local police municipalities supporting this at all.

It will not, we’ll just put tape over the cameras

About as well as gun control. 

My local Toyota dealership has no new Camrys on the lot. So, 1st gear checks out around here.

Since it appears that I’m first, I would like to submit that this is not how riddles work. By this logic, your name starts with a J and ends with a Y and no one would be able to guess it in a reasonable amount of time. 

More like syrup, KGB and Cabot Private Stock.

first of all... holy shit 4 jobs... i had to go back and re-read that part to make sure i read it correctly the first time. I hope the jobs hold enough balance to where you can enjoy the rest of your life outside ‘work.’

“regional contraband” between New England & New Mexico - you were running a maple syrup/Hatch chile smuggling operation?

Cannonball runs are the only way I knew how to get to a far away location before I got married. (drive from New England to New Mexico, 2200 miles or 25-28 hours 4 times a year). I usually transported a lot of regional contraband back and forth so flying was out of the question.

On one hand, sucks you had to sink some money into the Suburban. However, once you get it fully sorted I think you’ll truly be thrilled with it. The Suburban is a great choice for a modern day road-tripping vehicle, well, as long as you can afford the fuel. I think you’ve just seen how good it is, even in less than…

Bad ideas turn into great stories.

“And I hope we never have to do it again.”

Darna - I don’t know where you get your data from but this line is empirically incorrect: