I'd be freaked out if I was him too. Hackneyed sportswriters have proven time and again that the man is a lightning rod.

DISRE2PECTFUL.

Catanzaro: [Negotiates Log Grip]
Catanzaro: [Handles Salmon Ladder]
Catanzaro: [Scales Warped Wall]
Color Guy: Catanzaro is killing it so far. KILLING it!
Play-By-Play Guy: But here's where it gets tricky.
Catanzaro: [Jumps over Slow and Low]
Catanzaro: [Dodges Hawaiian Punch]
Catanzaro: [Finishes Chicken Fingers With Deadly…

I feel almost positive you didn't actually watch these videos.

Right. It requires zero strength to do any of that. And it's a course specifically designed for short people, so there's another point in her favor...

I really thought he'd end up a Laker. Figured he'd want to end up on a team that blows as much as he does.

My favorite part of this is that it is an argument between America and 'Murica.

All of them and a half

only the cardinals have all the unwritten rules written down. You will have to check with them.

As Cardinal fan you are contractually obligated to defend this kind of crap from Wainwright. Whenever Wainwright performs poorly he shoots off his mouth, and tries to belittle his opponents, while expertly distracting us from his terrible performance. He did it tonight. Remember "Mickey Mouse" Gonzalez in the playoffs.

Someone get Brian McCann on the horn.

Hey, if Mickey Mantle could get an easy one from Denny McLain as a sign of respect, I don't know why Derek Jeter can't get one from Adam Wainwright. This was just a St. Louis Cardinal honest to God playing the game the right way!

So... no one who was present?

If he wanted my admiration, chin music.

I'll take the apology as an apology for extending Fox's night-long cocksucking of Jeter so...apology accepted.

I think Gandhi was probably a better person than Derek Jeter.

[Science experiment in progress.]

Glad they didn't take that time to honor Tony Gwynn or anything…

Also:

The Pouncey twins answered the Cameo accusations by claiming they only made a very brief appearance.

Please show your work.