Buddy: Well boys, let's celebrate. What do you want to do on your big day?

whoosh

When the U.S. wins we'll take over Canada, rename poutine and call it gravy fries, and convince everyone that we won the war of 1812.

You forgot to add a link to your movie review.

• +0.5 (points deducted for not including Putin in joke)

Hannah Storm would like to avoid being a Burn-Gal.

Do you want to be Amazing? Here's a few tips:

As a New Orleans native I can tell you first hand that public nudity, lax drinking laws and spicy food does get old. So yeah I'm going to get caught up on Walking Dead.

"And I thought they smelled bad on the outside!"

Look Vilma, I gave you the benefit of the doubt during the bounty scandal. And every time you shred your knee and they rebuild it with crepe paper and rubber bands I say "He's got another year in him! Veteran! Experience!"

They never showed Bob Costas draining the pus from his eye. That's ten minutes right there.

"Just sayin"

All Dogs Go to Gulag

Where would someone hide Sausage?

I learned from an episode of G.I. Joe that apple seeds have a small amount of cyanide in them. So if you eat the core you'll die.

Oh boy, how you gonna keep them down on the farm once they've seen Svetlana Stepanushka.