Just ask The Martian :<)

I hope you realize you can go a long way to helping us by getting rid of Kinja Deals!

And after you read this article, the next one is the Deals of the Day...

Vote: How to Cook Everything

Mark Bittman’s Book How to Cook Everything took me from making fried Spam and Mac N Cheese to actually cooking some kick-ass meals for my family. Its got great tutorials on knife skills, shopping skills, and substitutions. It has advanced recipes and beginner recipes. I suggest this book to anyone just learning to…

Vote:How to Cook Everything

Don’t marry your first love fresh out of high school, no matter how much you love her. You need to get out there, you need the experience. You both do. If it’s supposed to happen you’ll find your way back to each other, but if not you’re better off knowing now. Don’t find yourself in your mid-30’s without any real…

DON’T. Just...don’t.
No, I can’t explain.
Because explaining would probably do just as much harm.
I’m not being fucking CRYPTIC, I’m trying to SAVE YOU.
THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME.
You ungrateful asshole.
Well I WOULDN’T have this much grey hair if you’d just fucking listen to me now.
...
...
Motherfucker. I’ll kill you.
Th…

Vote: Weather Underground

VOTE: KeePass - I use in addition to LastPass. Keepass is my master password file while LastPass contains a subset for daily use. One of the features includes attaching files to the password entry... great for those QR codes for two-factor authentication.

WE CAN'T HELP OUR NAMES, YOU CRUEL BULLY.

Because she was an ass about it. She was rude to the server as were her friends. If she'd been polite then fair enough it would be mean to laugh, but she wasn't.

"VERY allergic to gluten"

This is a goddamn outrage. This has NO BUSINESS on my Deadspin page. WHAT IS HE THINKING? Dale, what am I supposed to tell my kids? How am I going to explain this to them? They look at athletes and, yes, umpires, as ROLE MODELS and now you go about taunting this in my face. Dale, it's "Mike and me." It didn't seem…

"After further review, it has been determined that the ball carrier was not facing Mecca at the time of his celebration; therefore the penalty stands."