24 hour news cycle, friends.

It's almost like the show positively influenced a generation of people who can now afford to pay back the favor.

Oh fuck off.

Nope. I would abuse this immediately.

We're being critical of an actor for not doing enough for our nation's literacy problem.

I'm a straight girl. I've been rejected, and it sucks. But goddamn I never felt entitled to anything. I worked on improving myself. Two years into an amazing relationship with the dude of my dreams and I'm so glad I never even considered throwing it all away by gunning down a crowd of men.

You must be fun at parties.

People don't like political ads. I don't like them either. But health care isn't about politics. It's about people. It's not about a website that doesn't work ... It's about people, and millions of people have lost their health insurance. ... Obamacare doesn't work.

Cute.

"...false advertising about the ingredients in its dog and cat foots."

*foods

Of course Weiss's victims were white.

#GermanJokes

Hey just FYI but the MLS is a thing, too.

As a bitter Silent Hill fan, how much longer does Silent Hill get to be the atmospheric survival horror masterpiece we use to describe far better games? Have they not squandered all good will with the past 4+ games?

The best part was when the Discovery Channel threw the '#MaggotButt' tag on up on the screen, in case anyone wanted to tweet about a guy getting maggots in his butt.

Reminded me of this gem from the Dr. Horrible commentary:

Did he get his Parker Posey Pox cured?

Eternal fuck-up gets $2 million to be on a reality show, followed by $1 million for a book about fucking up.

Life is fair.

The guy with the purple shirt clearly doesn't get her perspective, based on his body language and the way that he aggressively looms over her in the segments where they're talking standing up.

Is it just me or is Vin Diesel completely fucking adorable?

GIVE US PSYCHONAUTS 2 PLEASE.