Even if he really did have cancer, he’d just be a shitty person with cancer. I never understood the rush to deify sick people. The can suck just as much as the rest of us do.

And Slade had a job and the appearance of propriety.

Rubio hates his job, so he’s just not going to do it. Got anything to say about that, South Florida? You’re paying the man to miss votes.

I assumed his audience was more female than male. My understanding is that Whiskeytown was a lame version of Uncle Tupelo (which was incredibly masculine), and Ryan Adams is the lame Jay Farrar.

And the worst thing about him is: HE IS BORING. His music may as well be a sleeping pill.

What the GOP is becoming.

YASS! The Chili’s parking lot cancer scare. Wouldn’t it have been easier for her to just admit that she just likes wigs? Nothing wrong with that. Own it, Trashbag!

I’ll believe him if he drops dead within two years. I’ll learn my lesson.

I don’t believe Vicki was intentionally lying to anyone. She’s just not that intelligent, at least outside of her ability to sell insurance.

I once watched a mother tell her 4-year-old that Jesus doesn’t love girls who throw fits. I wanted to scoop her up, pat her head, and tell her Jesus may not even be real, and not to sweat it.

Keep praying, motherfucker.

I know some of these men, also. Most of them dated, married, and divorced our worst specimens. Probably because they were so loathsome to begin with that they couldn’t attract a decent mate. In short: we have a giant cesspool of shitty people marrying, birthing shitty children, divorcing, and repeating. America!

Ted Cruz is the human embodiment of a sad trombone.

Only assholes use the word “copius” when referring to any amount of alcohol.

Care to address this, Ms. Richards? (sorry, this posted huuuuge)

And Amen. (I may be about a decade older than you are. )

Rent it to the person on the top. That person should live in a dive-bar restroom.

Wait, judging other moms for being too put-together is a real thing? As a new mom, I DID put effort into my appearance. Putting on makeup and clothing that fit held me together, and I thought that would help attract friends. It didn’t, and now I know why. Fuck this bitch.

Don’t forget 227! Lester and Mary Jenkins may not have been attorneys or doctors, but they worked hard, loved each other, and raised well-adjusted Brenda. And who could forget Family Matters?!

Names with punctuation bother me. I can look through clinical charts at my job, and find the apostrophes in a child’s name in multiple positions within the name, all in the parent’s own handwriting sometimes. I want to spell the child’s name correctly because that’s one of the most basic forms of respect for a person,…