Gosh, this is the last thing in the world I'm going to worry about. Jeeps aren't good enough? Have to have a posh buggy? Too bad. Wa wa wa, the feds took my illegal toy.

Whatever. I've had milk in my coffee, by the glass with cookies and over my cereal my entire life and I'm a monster on cross-country skis all winter and bikes all summer. My BMI is 22 and blood work's all good. I'm watching the species go extinct and you're worried about my milk intake?

Women need to stop pissing-off gun owners. Is there some other point here? As pointed out, the laws already prohibit gun possession by people accused of or convicted of domestic abuse but guns are so widely available that this has little or no impact.

Somebody really lit his pilot. Ba da boom.

He means what the United States will be. It hasn't reached its crescendo yet. Hard to compare with places that have the active automatic weapons, tanks, TOW missiles, IEDs, rape, summary execution, stoning, slavery and the all the A ticket attractions. We're like an Elitch's Amusement Park compared to Disney Globe.

That has worked so well in the past that absolutely definitely it will work this time if we just commit to doubling down at every opportunity. Let's apply that globally. What the Hell. The 7.3 billion populoids could really use some "thinning." Like nuclear bomb scale trimming. This conventional war approach is not…

Who knew they were being any less than fully brutal and completely, insanely pressing with the full weight of their armed forces. Seems the only step left is to carpet bomb ISIS back to the stone age, letting God sort out anybody that got in the way. That's going to take out a chunk of France though.

Walking down the street with a colleague I was stunned when she revealed that she had been the child victim of Satanic rituals. She had no idea until her psychiatrist brought back the memories under hypnosis. Her silbings and parents, she said, vehemently denied that this ever happened but she was quite sure now.…

I don't know how you do it. My friend the young DA just looks like Hell sometimes and he really can't talk to anybody about it either except in the most general terms. We live in a resort town where you could imagine it's all roses and he just spends day after day dealing with monsters who have abused or sometimes…

I've got a young DA friend who deals with shit like this .... wait, this is extreme even by his standards ... but even so, pitty the DA fuckers who have prosecute these crimes. Imagine finishing a trial when the teacher at a "Christian" school turned out to be a serial pedophile only to take on the young mother who…

I watched "The Armstrong Lie" last night. He's got millions in the bank and nobody can take away the glory years of dominating the competition and being idolized the world over. If there's any lesson it's "Hell yes, cheat for all you're worth. Make millions and live among the other thieves and scoundrels with your…

So you're allowed to cheat if you do as much damage in one area as you gain in another? That article makes no sense. Giving up an inch in the trajectory if you are 1/2 again as likely to hold on to the pigskin is a no brainer.

So we should listen carefully to what Bill Nye says? Hey, I am a scientist - if a degree in mathematics and chemistry qualifies - and live in a freakin ski area where it used to snow. Let me tell you something ....

Lot of ewes celebrating down there.

Move the dooms day clock up a minute. Maybe she can get John McCain to complete her ticket. Then just leave a second or two.

A Corvette owner = a cunt. Too bad. Sob sob.

Pretty sure I know Nightmare Phone Girl by Nightmare Bindle Girl. She's at the bar when she drops her cocaine but, lucky for her, my employee, from a completely unrelated public entity, picks it up and returns it to her. Later that evening she loses her drugs again. She decides my employee must have them. She contacts…

Well, at least the idiot won't have it parked under a tarp gathering dust like most of these useless "supercars."

That's why I always delate my bicycle tires. They have less mass to pull up hill when they're almost flat.

Squeeze it as you put it on the scale, then ignore the scale.