@Eddie Murray Sparkles: The stray blades of strange grass on his divot tool should have been the first clue.

@Eddie Murray Sparkles: Tibianest, I didn't have him pegged as the favourite beforehand.

@alex_mcg: Not the amount of THC in my system. Nope, not that at all.

So I'd like to just take a moment to extend a hearty FUCK YOU to people who clog up the Facebook feed by posting status updates every four seconds.

I assume this is the school you go to if you like skeeting on public objects.

I'm more familiar with 'bate-then-switch performances.

@Cyrus_the_virus:

FACT: Over 40% of all students at Memphis major in Necromancy.

Casey: Yeah, so the other day I was leaving class, and some young punk came over and tried to beat me up.

"He's just like those of us who have millions stashed away to feel empowered enough to engage in a public-relations ploy."

@Hatey McLife: So you're saying you wouldn't have the Guts to try it?

Cockblocked By Hot Tub Cripples:

/closes door behind himself

Day 3 - Grolsch

@JohnnyDrinky: I just want you to know one thing if dude ends up being a warped dermis upholsterer bent on adding you to his collection...

"miraculously withstood being pelted by a soccer ball, then a cleat to the torso, before he finally died on a cold gurney surrounded by men in scrubs frantically yanking"

What These New Charlie Sheen Interviews Tell Us About Fame And The Perils Of Supplementing Your Thinking Through A Straw Then Going Public

I don't think I need to specify who this is dedicated to.