Scour garage and estate sales, second-hand stores, etc. for a vintage Griswold frying pan. I have one and they are just that smooth. I think the metallurgy is a little different from today’s cast iron because my Griswold heats up faster, more evenly than any of my other newer cast iron cookware.

One of my older Android tablets appears at risk, though my Win PC does not. Hmm.

I'm with the folks who've already noted this is likely illegal. Contact your state's department of labor and find out what state law requires. You may have two options (based on similar personal experience): 1) pursue through state dept. of labor, which may be slow to act; 2) threaten to go to both small claims to get…