Still longer than I’d last in an MMA fight. Or an arm wrestling match. Or an actual wrestling match. Or in any type of physical activity besides typing this comment.

I blame the injury on the airbag not deploying during the Carr crash.

Legend has it, that as soon as the owner says that it was John Cena’s car, you lose the ability to see it.

This could be the start of a new (D-List) celebrity trend! I mean, I’d definitely buy Sarah Palin’s tears or Barbeque Becky’s. Or Melanie Trump’s.

I see some redundancy in the headline.

What a fucking excellent response from google, using T_D to prove Trump wrong. Brilliant.

Like most passes sent his way, Benjamin should just drop this feud.

Hey, that’s unfair. The owner is also offering 40% off imminent diarrhea. 

Trump is also looking to revoke the security clearance of Frederick Douglass. 

username checks out

This is shockingly accurate. 

The ritual is very simple.

Corker or Flake or Snowe or Collins or McCain or Sasse, who all wring their hands and wax poetic about what a dangerous, unstable despot he is, all have the power to pull the e-brake on this shit show any time they like. They just need to leave the Republican party and become independents who caucus with the Dems and…

Why not both?

Nuance, tact, pragmatism, forethought, a multisyllabic vocabulary, these are just some of the skills that a president should possess. 

“No, Goddamn it, the President isn’t a traitor. He’s just completely mentally incompetent!”

Well it’s not like anyone with brain could have possibly thought that maybe electing a fucking idiot would be an extremely bad idea.

If there was any doubt that we are now living in 1935 Nazi Germany this week’s SCOTUS headlines should clear that up. Make no mistake, it will be worse this time.

“The Blonde Coward From The Hideo Kojima Documentary” should very much be on your business card.