My face would be all jacked up like van Der Beek's in the new Power/Rangers.

He should've been hanging with Tony Siragusa

The folks at Kotaku eagerly await your Remo Williams reference...
http://kotaku.com/shaolin-monk-r…

I respect the Tim Curry love on this site, but there is a new standard in pirating:

I don't think they took that picture at his house.

ME TOO! I got to take home a t-shirt and signed picture of Hakeem The Machine for being the most pumped up audience member.

Is that mech, breathing?

This never gets old.

So I take it you're not impressed.

"You don't fight with honor."
"No, but he did."

The team controlling the ball is called the "offense." The team trying to regain control of the ball is called the "defense." Like Pac-Man, yes—this is a game of duality, where the hunter can become the hunted on a moment's notice.

Back in my day, they swung the banhammer for lesser offenses.

Actually, he's deceptively fast.

Every girl I date seriously must eventually pass a test. It happens at a certain point in every relationship I have; by then she basically knows what she's getting with me, including my tendency to get weirdly obsessed with things. The bands Titus Andronicus and Belle & Sebastian, for one thing, or Game of Thrones.…

I hear they're coming out with a Zune version just for you.

You want tact? Call a tactician. You want somebody's ass nailed, you call Gus Petch.

They should make them the size of Dippin' Dots so you can get them out of a bowl with a straw.

Hummus goes good with celery, too. But measure it out first then put the container away, or else you could eat the whole thing.

He's talking about the under-reported Superdome plumbing outage that coincided with the power outage.