"I mean, did I say she was a slut? Sure! But I can't believe they wrote that down! I guess it's true, the pen is mightier than the s word."

Looks like *somebody* never got a man card in the 1st place.

Her posture makes a bit more sense when you realize the Heat installed slides for easier egress.

Amen bro. Would go get it myself but I'd probably get distracted giving straw hat a one-way ticket to #poundtown. That's right, double pounding!

It's almost worse to leave when you believe this might be the very end of your team's season.

Really disappointed that Paula is trying to margarinalize black people.

I know he's incredible and all, but I don't understand how Miggy was able to score a .12

These days Pirates and A's players are fine dancers, since they dance like nobody's watching.

Hee!

This is so stupid. Why spend millions on an Iris diaphragm when you can just pop in Dizzy Up The Girl and boom! - not pregnant.

+1

I think Greg Oden's team doctor may have been an orthodontist - he was always being sent home with braces.

Nice.

+1

I don't know what's more surprising - that Jane looks that good downstairs or that Tarzan is black.

Boy oh boy all this hard tackle talk is giving me a two inchworm.

What a funny kid. Would love to see what he has in store for next year's speech, but like any Dodger fan I'm sure he'll be gone midway through the sixth.

Kerry's follow-up text was even more suspicious.

Joke all you want, but how many of us can truly say we've found our white whale?