This is incredible. +1

While he is good at table tennis, he has never scored a point in the real thing due to his habit of always swinging and missing on Love.

"Instead they would rather be poolside in Dubai, sipping a sickly-sweet cocktail with a pair of oversized headphones draped around their neck"

When he restructured his contract, he made the same amount of total money but pulled the payments forward into a signing bonus. It was not a team-first act of charity. Let's dial down the ever-present "management is screwing its employees" slant for this story.

That's great.

It is clearly the antiJezebel site in that the people here have critical reading skills and a sense of humor that allows them to recognize irony when they see it.

"He claims the athletic department "100 percent" knew what the school was doing to keep athletes eligible."

I'm only a week late, but this was fantastic. +1

You deflect well. I am not defending the UAE. I am saying that someone who has never stepped foot in the place and who doesn't know Dubai from Abu Dhabi has no business offering an opinion of any sort.

It adds tremendously to your credibility in describing "one of the worst places on earth" that you cannot even differentiate between Dubai and Abu Dhabi, and have never been to either one.

Ray - putting the 'ish in "fittish" since elementary school.

+1

+1

Well, I'm not sure about the "we" part. One day it will all be clear to you.

Whew, thank you. I was hoping for a random gif. That is what the comments section at Deadspin has been missing all of these years.

Now I understand, and I applaud The Amazing Sneijderman for his nuanced way of helping other people cognitively deal with the horror of child rape. I will try harder to come up with a serious critique next time. Thank you for showing me the error of my ways.

I don't know what I expected, really. I was just hoping for provocative discussion with the author sprinkled with the occasional earth-shattering anonymous tip from a famous athlete using a burner account.

Fair enough. From now on, I will enter all of my life situations thinking "child rape is bad." I hope that somewhat quells your disturbance.

I like jokes, just not ones that make me think too hard. That is why I keep coming over to Fittish. I heard they have a new writer who toils exclusively in the art of simplistic humor.

I didn't come here to read jokes. If you cannot come up with a serious opinion like "child rape is bad," then you might consider retiring.