You should tour. You’d make a great stand-up comic sans.

Dogger1972, Just wanted to say your last statement about Secretariat brings back some pretty fond memories. I was lucky enough to be at the Belmont with my granfather in 1973. Being a naive 16 year old kid I couldn’t understand why I was watching grown men with tears in their eyes. It was then that I asked my…

They have, on average. Look the footage again. American Pharaoh runs two seconds behind Secretariat. Slower, but not crazy slower. Certainly not slower than Secretariat’s competitors. But American Pharaoh’s competitors are faster too.

At last, video evidence that 2:24 is faster than 2:26.

I saw Insane Masturbatory Rampage open for Slayer in '92.

"What are you gonna do tonight, Stef?"

Billy, I hate to nitpick, but I have a problem with the headline. The phrase "insane, masturbatory rampage" should be "insane masturbatory rampage." You shouldn't use a comma when the last adjective outranks its predecessor and is an integral part of the noun phrase. In this case, the rampage is not both insane…

Sortland had a blanket, a cell phone and a box of Wheat Thins with him.

Fire. This. Motherfucker. Right. Now. If he made a joke about his black coworker being a criminal or his Latino coworker being an illegal immigrant or his gay coworker being a fairy, this would be national news and he would have been fired by the time the last whistle blew.

This happens all the time in my country, really stupid jewish jokes, then I tell them I'm actually jewish, and awkward silence ensues, followed by I don't mean you, I mean the other jews, you know the JEWS, JEWS.

I had Hank Bauer's brother as a teacher in high school (Santa Clara HS, Oxnard, CA). We called him "Mr. Bauer." Couldn't tell you his first name. He was a football coach who taught typing (how's that for a stereotype?). I was a smartaleck pencil-necked geek. One time Mr. Bauer told me he was going to "pop your…

The frustrating thing about this is that the man will likely issue whatever tepid apology is required and then just keep on keepin' on, having no idea why we can't take a joke around here anymore fer crissakes. He (and to be clear, I'm just using him as a proxy for a certain type of old dude) knows in his heart of…

my favorite part was Bauer realizing halfway through the joke that he didn't know enough about Lewin's family to make it more specific than "family member." also: fuck Bauer with a giant iron star of David.

Bauer: [tells copper joke]

"I sincerely apologize for my error in judgement during yesterday's broadcast. I was trying to imply that Josh Lewin can be solicited for rough, sexual intercourse for as little as a penny by anyone, including his family members. My comments have nothing to do with anti-Semitism, and were only meant to remind our…

Lewin is a fantastic play by play man. He rescues Bauer at least 3x per game, it's always painful to hear him going off the rails. Not a Chargers fan, but I'll listen to those games wire-to-wire for Lewin.

Jezebel Basic

Official response from pizza thrower in 2013

That being boston, no actual Pizza was harmed in the making of this video.

Oh you. +1