The dad of a friend of mine weaves. With a fucking enormous loom that takes up a whole room.

I can knit, like, a square. Of if I'm feeling creative, a rectangle. But I can't figure out anything more complicated than that. I have no idea how people create sleeves, or little bonnets or socks or any of that shit.

You didn't need the final line. I knew what this was. And I have two cats (and two dogs) so I'm totally stealing it.

I too will admit to remixing this Homer Simpson classic for my pets.

Haha I JUST posted that I sing to my cats in the tune of "You are my Sunshine". Every time! That song is a hit!(And easy to manipulate lyrically).

The last song is "Little Spanish Flea". I sing to my cats, mostly to the tune of "You are my sunshine" and all complete nonsense. And/or "meow" lyrics.

I'm with you, my dog reacts much more comically to things that appear to be animals but are not, e.g. lion statues. I was hoping for that kind of reaction.

Yah tried that too. Normally works but was in a hurry this time.

No they didn't starve the monkeys, I know that. But still: cucumber > nothing, no matter the circumstances. More is more.

She is hand raised so yes, I am like her "mommy". All is forgiven now. Thankfully.

Erm thanks guys - I'm in postgrad vet school myself, so... I did try that! I meant like, full proper feral - like I've seen before in shelters. The scruff completely disappears in a blaze of hissy/spitty/puffy anger. I think the main problem was that she went round to the neighbours, and I went over there to get her.…

The first one is like "SNOW! I love you snow. I missed you."

Fuck yes! I know me a veganlicious PPK pie when I see one!

I had a major disagreement with my cat today vis-à-vis getting her to come back inside... she completely lost her shit at me and went totally fucking feral, growling and hissing and scratching. So yup, I can believe she's a mini-lion and so can my poor bandaged hand.

However, what the monkey does do (and this has been demonstrated with chocolate coins in children as well) when it actually chucks a "well fuck this shit!" tantrum is throw away the cucumber, preferring to have nothing than to allow this bullshit to continue. This actually makes things worse for the monkey, because…

Yes, as long as it was a defence attorney spouting this shit, not a judge (which sadly happens too often, also) then we can maintain some faith in humanity.

I started doing that sort of stuff much, much earlier. And (as far as I can remember, right Oprah?) I was never abused.

SAME! I am SO foreign.

I remember hearing this about the last one and thinking "that's what they said last time". So yeah, there is a bit of a pattern.

Doesn't this happen every time with GTA? We hear some bullshit about there being no plans for it to come out on PC and then (after some time) it inevitably does? It's happened enough times now that we know the drill.