I guess if they had a contest like that now they’d be the Toronto Teamy McTeamface.

Oh man. That is definitely destined for this year’s ‘Rectums’ post.

Oh man. That is definitely destined for this year’s ‘Rectums’ post.

You can change the number of blinks? Sweet! If I get a car with that feature I’m setting it to one.

Well, at least they’ll probably buy a lot of razors to destroy.

I think the way to go is for House Democrats publicly make their case to Senate Republicans, while signalling intention to impeach as soon as there is sufficient support in the Senate. That will clearly make Senate Republicans the impediment in the public eye. And I would think it would please progressive voters who…

Their Hue lights don’t really appeal to me, but I do like their Warm Glow dimmables.

Their Hue lights don’t really appeal to me, but I do like their Warm Glow dimmables.

Yeah, just ask Northern about that!

My pens have buttons, not caps. Should I just chain them to cinder blocks?

Nah. Reagan wasn’t conservative enough for this current GOP rabble.

I think he was a surgical savant. There’s really no other logical explanation for the combination of his past medical career and what we’ve seen from him since.

Yup.

After the failed attempt to impeach Clinton, the Democrats came back with gains in congress, unusual for the party of the sitting President in a mid-term.

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Any strange patterns noticed in nearby fields?

They can have their cake and eat it too, menu selection wise. Just make separate drive-through lines: the “slow line” with the full menu, and the “express line” with a limited menu of quick- or ready- prepped items.

Wasn’t there a Real Sex episode with a segment on this, or am I thinking of something else?

You can also try making the rental clerk think you’re older by sitting on the shoulders of another person under 25 and covering up with a long coat. A hat and fake mustache are good touches.

Seems like that needs a lot of updating.

So it’s like Heinlein’s ‘The Number of The Beast’ except instead of one universe’s literature being another universe’s reality, it’s one universe’s Onion articles being another universe’s reality.