I got one of these emails from the idiot dealer I bought from 3 weeks after I bought a brand new car.

I wouldn’t do business with anyone sending me one of these purely because I feel like they’re insulting my intelligence.

That’s why you buy this as an alternative to a $25k v-12 land yacht, that you can afford, and have a healthy cash reserve to keep it on the road and up-to-snuff.

I think you were on to something with the old luxury car — But only if it’s a 10 year-old DTS. You won’t see an X350 XJ8 in Butte, MT, but I’ll bet you’d see a DTS or seven.

The Drivers’ Ed teacher at my High School when I was in the program had previously had at least one stroke and was known to fall asleep in the car while kids were driving on the highway for the first time.

Why?!?! Why not just attach a trailer and have the ability to turn corners on two-lane roads?

I actually like the Lincoln TownChero... I’m not sure how I feel about liking it though. Was it a Flower car originally?

Get hold of Smyth performance - http://www.smythkitcars.com/

Yeah, did you see that Goldwing tow rig the other week?

A lot of people, myself included, have been railing on Lincoln for not doing something to advance their lineup. I think most people assumed they’d just copy Cadillac. This is an advancement that isn’t in the realm of Cadillac — They’re obviously not going after BMW. It is a real modern interpretation of the American…

“All right!

8 Litre, 500ci 8-Cylinder making 160hp and 300lb-ft?

Why? Anyone who’s paid any attention to terrorist in the Middle East has seen them riding in Toyotas for the past 30+ years...

Hill “Descent” control. Not “Decent.”

Yep, this is where we channel Tavarish for the right answer. A couple of year-old, well-maintained version of the “nicer” car for the same price as the “lesser” car.

That’s what the original Mini Van was...

My buddy had a black ‘98 that he blacked out all the chrome on, and put black powdercoated Mustang Cobra wheels on, it looked fantastic.

Paging Doug DeMuro, I think we have a potential Hummer replacement.

Damnit where the hell is “Mother-in-law Ejector Seat?!”

$1.96m? That’s like 78 V6 Mustangs, brah. 392 NA Miatas!

“Former proud owner,” perhaps?